Category: Life

A nod to the women who have helped mould me

I had an exciting start to my day!  I found my old music on my hard drive!  Needless to say, I have been dancing the morning away!  There very few stress relievers as effective as a good shake to music you love.  Not only does music help me shake off the stress but it can also uplift, and motivate me. I was also fortunate to become a woman when the music scene was exploding with loads of strong women.  They encouraged us to believe in ourselves as women through their music.  I also found their strength and independence intoxicating.  The music videos were full of sass and I wanted to be like them.   This post is a nod to these fabulous, strong, pioneering women!

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The 80’s

As a teen, I listened to the likes of Aretha Franklin, Diana Ross and the Supremes, Dionne Warwick, Anita Baker and Regina Bell, Gloria Gaynor, Whitney Houston and Madonna.  Behind the music were these powerful personalities that radiated off the screen in their music videos and blasted through the speakers.  Their voices were awesome.  They sang with such passion.  I figured out early on that I was never going to make it as a singer but I could still be strong and independent like them.  On the sidelines was my dad constantly telling me that I could do anything a man could do and I could even do it better.  (oh the poor men who have encountered me since…very few egos have come away unscathed😜.  Sorry guys.  Now you have someone to blame) My mother has always been fiercely independent by nature and got on with doing what needed to be done quietly in the background.  Thanks to her example, the idea of been dependent on anyone has never really entered my mind. At the same time I spent a lot of time around my dad’s sisters who were all very strong and independent women.  Thanks to my family, it was almost inevitable that I would be a strong and fiercely independent women.  Then came the 90’s…

The 90’s and beyond

OMG, the hip and R&B scene exploded with amazing, bold female artists.  Their music and their persona’s reinforced everything that I believed I could be as a woman. Queen Latifah, Mary J Blige, TLC, En Vogue, Missy Elliot, Salt-N-Peppa, MC Lyte, Janet Jackson to name just a few. I was just stepping into the big world.  These funky divas were my inspiration.  At the same time, Nelson Mandela had been released from prison and suddenly we had opportunities available to us that were had only dreamed of. To be exposed to all these dynamic women of colour making their way in the world at that point in my life was a heady experience.  At the same time my friends were all strong personalities as well and I drew strength and inspiration from them as well.  My friend Lyall’s mum, Aunty Merle, played a huge role in our lives sharing her words of wisdom with us when ever we needed them.  We were blessed to have each other as well as strong role models like aunty Merle guiding us.   Of course later came exposure to the likes of Oprah and Maya Angelou, Winnie Mandela and Albertina Sisulu.  They were such powerful matriarchal figures. I only started paying attention to  them a little later in my life though. Beyonce has also become another source of inspiration.  Her work ethic and spunk are inspiring.

I genuinely believe that there has never been a greater time to be a woman.  I know there is still much to overcome.  I believe we will overcome and we will continue to rise. We run the world after all! 😉  Salute to you all!

I leave you with this thought provoking quote from Alice Walker.  Don’t forget to like and share if you enjoyed this post.

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“Men are stubborn. Women have strong personalities…”

Sorry men but all women know this to be true…and yes, there really is a difference. I had a good laugh today when one of my colleagues shared the outcome of  her conversation  with her husband last night about this very topic.  His response…”stop using “Woolworths language” on me…lol!  As far as he was concerned, it is the same thing.

Men are stubborn

#menarestubborn #blog #life

I was actually having a similar discussion with my cousin last night and she said the same thing to me.  I, of course, agreed.  Based on my experiences with males they are just stubborn creatures.  From my dad to my son and everyone I have encountered in between is as stubborn as a mule. As frustrating as it is, it can actually be quite an endearing quality  but only in hindsight.  At the time of encountering the stubbornness,  a woman could find herself in jail on an attempted murder charge!  Ladies, is it just me or do they automatically sense when we have PMS and chose exactly that time to be at their most stubborn or are we just more sensitive to their stubbornness at that time of the month???

Stubborn men are magnets for women with strong personalities

Have you also noticed how the stubbornest men seem to end up with women who have the strongest personalities?  I suspect it is the lure of the challenge that draws us to these men.  We want to be the ones that “open their eyes” to the error of their ways.😜 Of course we would never want to change them…I know you were thinking it guys but believe me when I say it is not true.  In our eyes, there is a difference to making you aware of something and trying to change you.  We do, of course, hope that the newfound awareness will make you choose to change of your own accord but we would never expect you to change.😉 Wait, let me take a step back, we first pray for the awareness and then hope that you will make the necessary changes.  We don’t hold our breathe though as we could turn blue and die…🤪

Very stubborn men ooze testosterone

Men do have various degrees of stubbornness.  The very stubborn ones ooze testosterone I’m sure because they are super sexy too. Maybe it’s not the testosterone, maybe it’s just the thrill of the challenge that makes us see them as sexy.  Either way, I don’t know about you but I find that very stubborn men are sexy and are very hard to walk from.  Now men, this is not an invitation to dig your heels in further.   The good news is that there is someone out there that will see you as the stubbornest mule they have encountered and find you sexy because of it.

Men are born hunters. Woman are born fixers. 

If a man is being stubborn about something, then hell yes, we will want to change his mind.  We are born fixers.  When are being stubborn about something we sometimes see it as a flaw that needs to be “fixed”.  (there I said it) Some women are wiser than others though and have learnt the art of planting the seed and waiting a man out.  I am not one of them.  I was definitely playing up in the trees when God was handing out patience.  I came skating in at the tail end of it.🤦🏽‍♀️ I will therefore be on his case from time to time to “open his eyes” to what ever it is you need to see.  We woman have a natural gift of foresight.  Trust us when we say “open your eyes”…

Sometimes you just have let the horse die of thirst next to the sparkling watering hole

As much as I love the challenge, I am also a firm believer in accepting that there are certain things I have no control over.   I think a lot of woman are starting to accept this.  There are so many strong woman who are single.  Happily so I might add.   One has to just let go and let God at some point.  I haven’t always been this way though.  I have been known to drag many a horse to water and even push it in before I accept that it will not drink.  Can’t take me anywhere!   These days I just leave them at the watering hole.  I need to conserve my energy to get back on the trail.  I am on a journey through this life after all and one day a willing (and sexily stubborn) companion will drink from the watering hole with me and walk off with me on that journey.  Of this I have no doubt.

So how do you know if you have a woman with a strong personality you ask. 

  • She is loyal to a fault.
  • She will challenge you and herself
  • She will have strong faith in her God and in you
  • She will invest her time, her love, her energy, her faith in you
  • She will be comfortable in her own skin
  • She won’t need your help but will ask for it anyway because she knows how important it is you
  • She thinks…a lot!
  • She laughs … a lot!
  • She tells it like it is (yes, sometimes it hurts…ok ok…it always hurts but once you are done licking your wounded ego, you will be grateful she said it.  Yes that’s right…because it… “opens your eyes”)

See the difference men? I thought you might 😉

So…let’s celebrate the stubbornness in men and the strength of women.  🥂 Life would be so boring if the sexes were the same.  Let me know what you think.  Do you have the same experience of the sexes?

If you enjoyed this…you know what to do. Like and share!

“I told myself: Life is growth. You grow or your die.” Phil Knight

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Shoe Dog: A memoir by the creator of Nike by Phil Knight…what a story!  I am not a big fan of autobiographies, but I definitely enjoyed the style of writing in this one.  It reads like a novel.  Full of twists and turns as well as valuable insights and lessons. Not only is a great story, it is also filled with great examples of what the power of intention can produce together with purpose and action.

Let me share with you a few of the key lessons that I learned from this book

  1. State your intention and own it.

Phil was clear from early on that he had a “crazy dream” and that was to own a running shoe store.  Everything he did thereafter was ultimately to make that dream a reality.  It was his sole focus.  It drove him.  His single-minded focus is what ensured that he would succeed.

He often quotes the following from George S. Patton in his book “Don’t tell people how to do things, tell them what to do and let them surprise you with their results.”  He knew what he wanted to achieve and largely left the people around him to get on with it.   Another example of how clarity of intention enables delivery of the intended result and sometimes more

2. God/The Universe will send you the right help at the right time

Whenever he needed to take the next step, help was always there.  It came in different forms, a new employee who had a skill that he didn’t realise the business needed or, a new supplier or a new source of finance just when everything seemed to be falling apart.  When your intention is clear, the right help will come at the right time.  You just need to be open to it and embrace it.

An example is employee no.1, Johnson.  In the book, it appears that he was largely left to his own devices.  He created the first store. He came up with idea of making branded T-shirts and photographing athletes with them on (even if they weren’t wearing Nike). He was as passionate about selling those Japanese running shoes and, in many ways, his initiatives took the company to the next level.

3. You will make mistakes, but you can overcome them

I think it is fair to say that Phil Knight made several mistakes along the way.  Some massive and some small.  Most of the time, the way he overcame them was through honesty. He didn’t always have much of a choice, but he stresses how honesty saved his hide more than once and it also brought them business when they weren’t expecting it.  Of course, it’s one thing to make a mistake but the important thing is to own up to it, learn from it and move forward.

4. Be open to learning

It appears that Phil Knight was quite the reader. He enjoyed learning and especially about other cultures.  He also looked for opportunities to learn from other people. He was constantly growing and evolving.  Often, he didn’t even believe in what others were recommending but he just did it anyway and that includes using the name “Nike” as the company name.

white graphing book
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5. Passion and purpose are powerful

There is a passage towards the end of the book that communicates the power or purpose way better than I could, so I am just going to share it here: “We wanted, as all great businesses do, to create, to contribute, and we dared to say it aloud.  When you make something, when you improve something, when you deliver something, when you add some new thing or service to the lives of strangers, making them happier or healthier, or better and when you do it all crisply and efficiently, smartly, the way everything should be done but so seldom is – you’re participating more fully in the whole grand human drama. More than simply alive, you are helping others to live more fully, and if that’s business, all right, then call me a businessman.”  A similar sentiment was shared by Steve Jobs when talking about Apple.  For me, it’s further proof that a selfless purpose together with passion and focused action are an unstoppable combination.  Yes I know, we pay through our noses for those very products.  They do achieve their intentions though in that their products do let us live more comfortable or convenient lives.

At the end of the day, if you are true to your purpose and you don’t just do something for the money, the money will come anyway.  Let’s not be naive though, the trick is being true to your purpose but be business savvy at the same time.

There’s a lot more learn from the book.  I plan on reading at least once more as there is always more to gain from it.

Hope you enjoyed this review. If you have read the book, I would love to hear your take on it.

Until next time… Happy Reading