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Letters to my son: #1 You are enough

I read somewhere recently that as parents, we are mere shepherds whose role it is to guide our children while they are in our care. I hope these letters will help him navigate life and help him find the path that God intended for him to walk.

mother and son in shadow on the sand
Just the two of us


Dear Alex,
Throughout life, you will meet people and find yourself in situations that will make you question your worth and abilities, and sometimes, you will even question your sanity. Sadly, a lot of the time, they will be people that you love and thought you could respect.
They will pick on your appearance, what you say, and what you do. They will also try to use your beautiful golden brown skin against you. They will try to belittle you in every possible way.
Don’t let them. Stand tall in the knowledge that you are enough just as you are. Everything about you is unique and is to be celebrated. Don’t ever be ashamed of who you are. Don’t let this make you arrogant, though. Remain humble and grounded. You will accomplish so much more by doing this.
Marianne Williamson says in her book “A Year of Miracles”: “The perfect you isn’t something you need to create because God already created it.” Please always remember this. You are enough as you are.
This is one of my favourite passages from Marianne Williamson’s book, A Return to Love. Let it help you when your confidence is low.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
― Marianne WilliamsonA Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles”

All my love and then some more,

Mum ❤️

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Not All Eating Plans are Created Equal

Hello Everyone! It’s been a while. How is it that we are halfway through the 2nd quarter of the year already? Anyway, I have popped in to share a recent experience with a weight challenge I joined. One this for sure, not all eating plans are created equal.

Maya Angelou famously said, ‘ When someone shows you who they are the first time, believe them.’ Well, I have learned that this is not only true for people but for programmes as well. I recently took up my medical aid’s healthy weight challenge (yes, I am still on that journey😅). That was my first mistake.

Assumption is the mother of all…

The first alarm bells started ringing when I did the little survey when I signed up. There was no diabetic option under dietary requirements. I figured they already knew my diagnosis, so my diet would automatically be diabetic-friendly. I was wrong. I was pretty excited by the recipes they had provided. They looked simple enough and relatively tasty. More alarm bells went off when I saw the mention of low-fat yoghurt and what looked like a lot of carbs. Given all the bad press and the growing scientific evidence that low-fat is not as healthy as everyone thought it was, I was surprised that they are still recommending it. The other crucial red flag was that nutritional information was unavailable for the meals. The data was also kept from the dieticians that were supporting us. Despite all these red flags, I soldiered on. I had a dietician assigned to me, so I thought she would point out where a meal might need some adjustment for a person with diabetes. Once again, I was wrong.

Photo by Any Lane on Pexels.com

The Journey is Supposed to be Enjoyable

Nope, it wasn’t. It was stressful. I had to take pics of every meal and share them with the dietician daily. She would critique my meals which I really felt was unnecessary. Still, it was the closest I came to understanding the nutritional composition of my meals. Eventually, I resorted to using the app, My Fitness Pal to get a feel for how carb heavy my meals were. In the end, it was my body that told confirmed that this eating plan was not working for me. I was not losing weight, and I felt bloated and uncomfortable. Thankfully, I wasn’t gaining weight, but I definitely didn’t lose any. Eventually, I made a choice to stop following the plan. The dietician is still available to me as I signed up for the 6-month program, so let’s see how that goes. She would cost way more for one visit than I pay for daily access to her expertise monthly, so why not.

So I have decided to keep most of my meals low carb, high fat. I need to get back to doing the 16:8 IF. I have let that eating window slide to about 10 hours because I have been eating my last meal too late. The good news is that since I stopped that eating plan, I have lost 2kg over about 3 weeks, which is a good start. Now I need to keep these good habits up so that number on the scale maintains its downward trend.

My son and I have also joined the gym, although we have yet to make it a regular habit. I love classes and started the step class. Oh, my hat! The pace is hectic! The routine is not as simple as it was 20 years ago (Yes, it is that long since I joined a step class🫣), and the instructor includes a few Zulu dance moves here and there. It is good fun, but phew, it is a challenge.

Photo by Kseniia Lopyreva on Pexels.com

Well, that’s it from me for now. I hope all the mums have had a delightful and blessed Mother’s Day today. Bye for now!

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Going Vegetarian – What a Challenge!

My son and I decided to adopt a vegetarian diet for Lent. It’s required a whole new mindset when it comes to meal planning. There are positives though.

We are a week  into lent and my son and I had decided that we would give up meat for our Lenten fast.  While I am not a religious person, there are certain Christian rituals that I still believe in and look forward to participating in.  Lent is one of them.  For the record I was baptised into the Anglican faith as a baby and had my son baptised into it as well simply because it is one of those rituals that brings my soul peace.

Photo by BULBFISH on Pexels.com

Anyway, back to my vegetarian challenge!  It’s been rough. Other than the odd margherita pizza or a Greek salad, my son and I don’t generally do vegetarian dishes.  It was also a spur of the moment decision so we were not prepared.  There we were, munching on our flapjacks (we did not have pancake mix and were lazy to make some from scratch) on Shrove Tuesday when we decided that we would change our fast from chips and chocolates to meat.  With the cost of living today, both could be considered luxuries.

Thus far, besides vegetarian pizza’s, we have yet to find at least 5-6 dishes that we enjoy and can rotate for the Lenten period.    There is still 6 weeks to go after all.😜 My son was partial to the vegetarian version of “chicken nuggets” although I have a feeling they will be wasted if I buy them again.  My vegetarian pasta was awfully boring last night so I won’t be trying that particular recipe again.  I think tomorrow I will make a vegetable curry to excite the taste buds a little (hopefully). Any tasty vegetarian recipes recommendations will be very welcome by the way.

On the positive side, it has been good to spend the first week of lent strengthening my connection to God through prayer and a bit of mediation.  I still battle with reading my bible.  For some reason, I just can’t connect to it but I don’t let it get me down as I know that God will get His messages to me in a way that I will hear Him and understand what it is He needs me to know. In the meantime I am reading Marianne Williamson’s book, Return to Love. It’s a good read if you have not read it yet. At the moment I am being reminded to surrender to God’s will. That reminder has come just in time. I can feel that my ego has been over exerting itself of late! 😞

Another positive is that I have noticed that my blood sugar levels are averaging slighter lower this week which is probably due to the increased vegetable intake. The thing I do need to be careful of is allowing too many refined carbs creep into my diet through pizza and pasta. I quite interested to see if my son’s skin will also benefit form the change in diet. I am really hoping it will. He has really had a pretty bad case of acne this past year.

Well that’s it from me. Be blessed everyone.

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A room without books is like a body without a soul. – Cicero

Bloganuary Day 21

Today’s Prompt: Who is your favorite author and why?

Now there is a question that I don’t really have an answer to. I enjoy reading. Ever since I was a kid, I had to read something every day. To this day, no day is complete without me reading something even if it is an article or two on Medium or a blog post on WordPress. I have have shelves and shelves of both fiction and non-fiction books. I don’t know if I will ever get to read all of them but I live in hope.🤭 I do have some favourites though. Let’s start with the fiction:

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  • Lee Childs – I loooove Jack Reacher! He is such a unique character. I was horrified when they made Tom Cruise play him so I didn’t bother watching him. I must say that the Amazon Prime series actor is a lot closer to the picture I had of Reacher so I enjoyed season 1 and look forward to season 2 although I still prefer to read the books.
  • Jeffery Deaver – The master of deception. He keeps me guessing
  • James Patterson – I love that his chapters are so short. It results in the books having a good pace.
  • Ken Follet – I love the stories and how he weaves his love of cathedral architecture into his stories.
  • Michael Connelly – Both the Bosch and Mickey Haller series. I have also enjoyed how the stories have been brought to life in the TV series created for both characters.
  • George R.R. Martin – I have just started reading A song of Ice and Fire series and I just love his style.
  • J.K Rowling – I love the level of detail she adds to her stories. I marvelled as I read the Harry Potter series. I recently bought “The Cuckoo is Calling” which is written under her pseudonym, Robert Galbraith. I look forward to reading this series as well.

I used to enjoy Stephen King, Sydney Sheldon and Dean Koontz when I was at school. I read Stephen King’s “On Writing” a few years ago. It’s a must for aspiring writers.

Non fiction writers that I enjoy include

  • Malcoln Gladwell – Outliers made me think long and hard about the opportunities I wanted to give my son in order for him to make well informed choices later on in his life.
  • Walter Isaacson – I have yet to finish one of his biographies. They are so long but very enjoyable to read when I can fit them in. I have started Steve Jobs and Albert Einstein.
  • Gabby Bernstein – I love her take on spirituality. She really helped me find my way to God in recent years. This is also true of Florence Scovel Shinn’s books.

Let me also not forget the poetry of Billy Chapata.

As you can see, I could go on forever about the books that I read. A lot of the non-fiction books that I have read and are still to be read are probably easier to group together by topic rather than author as I am drawn to books on spirituality, psychology, finance (Mine needs serious help!), economics and business.

I have a list of new authors that I will be keeping an eye out for based on the recommendations of my fellow bloganuary participants. Just follow the hashtag #bloganuary to find a few that might interest you.

I’m off. I’ll leave you this beautiful quote about books and reading.

“As you read a book word by word and page by page, you participate in its creation, just as a cellist playing a Bach suite participates, note by note, in the creation, the coming-to-be, the existence, of the music. And, as you read and re-read, the book of course participates in the creation of you, your thoughts and feelings, the size and temper of your soul.”

Ursula K. Le Guin

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Home Sweet Home

Bloganuary Day 20 – only 11 days to go…

Today’s Prompt: What irritates you about the home you live in?

I am going to change this around and talk about what I love about the home I live in as I don’t enjoy focusing on the negative. There will always be things that I want to change about my home but that will be because I have gotten bored with seeing the same things in the same places to I will switch it up for a change in scenery. I also find that moving things around often changes the energy of the space.

So what do a I love about my home? Well I love that I have a home and that I get to share it with my son every day. I love that I have stairs as I always wanted a double storey home when I was a kid. I try and make sure that I run up the stairs a few times a day when I need to fetch something as my home is very small so it helps me get a little bit of exercise in every day.

I love my little garden out back although I have been neglecting it of late due to the influx of mozzies. They have my ankles for dinner! I love that I do have my own little patch of grass to ground myself on and space for my table and benches so that I can sit and watch the butterflies flitter and flutter about and watch the kittens chase each other. I find it very calming and peaceful even though there is a bust main road very close by.

I do need to give my home a complete overhaul as right now it is in complete disarray. I am constantly amazed at how I can get rid of an item of furniture and somehow, just somehow, I manage fill up that space with stuff before I can get to replace that furniture with a new piece. So, as I said, now I just have give every space a complete overhaul so that it looks pretty and has utility.

I live in a complex, from the car park, one has great views of the west of Durban, especially the beautiful sunsets. I’ll leave you with a pic of one that I took earlier this week.

African sunset
African sunset. Image credit: Author

So that’s it for today. Thanks for dropping by. Bye for now.

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Food, Glorious Food!

Bloganuary Day 18

Today’s Prompt: What’s your favourite meal to cook and/or eat?

Let me start by saying that I love to cook however, my cooking skills often leave a lot to be desired. My son cooks way better than me and makes a wonderfully tender fillet steak with butter and rosemary. We usually have it with chips/french fries. This is definitely one of my favourite meals to eat!

My son’s Butter and Rosemary steaks
Creamy Tuscan Chicken

The dish I have enjoyed making and eating is called Creamy Tuscan Chicken. I found the the recipe on the internet. It’s quick and easy and tastes delicious. I serve it with pasta most often. The recipe doesn’t call for it but I add basil at the end which just helps to make it taste more fresh and not too creamy. You can find the recipe here.

Creamy Tuscan Chicken served with Penne.

We seldom eat dessert with our meals but when we do, it’s most often triple chocolate pudding from Woolworths. It has a layer of chocholate sponge, white chocolate mouse and dark chocolate mouse. It no way good for my sugar levels but way worth it!

Thanks for stopping by! Bye for now!

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Sons Are the Anchors of a Mother’s Life – Sophocles

Bloganuary Day 16

Today’s Prompt: Describe the happiest day of your life

Today’s prompt is a no-brainer for me. The happiest day of my life was August 7th 2007. That was the day I found out I was pregnant. I used a home pregnancy kit and I remember it being a wednesday evening. I was in complete shock for a few seconds and then complete and utter joy swiftly overtook that shock! I was so excited I literally wanted to shout it from the roof top.

I lived alone and was so excited that I couldn’t sleep. I still had to have it confirmed by a dr but I new in my heart that was merely a formality. I spent that entire night planning on how I was I going make space for my child financially especially as I knew I was going to be a single mum from the get go. I hadn’t planned on falling pregnant but I felt so blessed by this wonderful surprise that God had gifted me with.

The next happiest day was the 7th Jan 2008 when I foound out he would be a boy and then of course, the day of his arrival was the 3rd happiest day of my life. I have been so fortunate that he has made motherhood a relatively easy going experience. We have had the usual ups and downs and thankfully we have come out of each episode stronger 😊🙏I am so blessed to call him my son.

My 💖
Just the two of us having some fun over the years
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Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be.– Sonia Ricotti

Bloganuary Day 15. (Eek we are half way through Jan already!!!)

Today’s Prompt: What fear have you conquered?

Hmmm…I guess there a quite a few major fears (well to me anyway) that I have conquered over the years.

When I was done studying, I needed practical experience in order to get my diploma, the experience was hard to come by. I was beside myself and had no idea what to do about it. My dad was very clear that he would not be supporting me now that I had completed my studies so I had to figure something out. I was beside myself with fear but I had to make it happen to I started applying for waitressing jobs while looking for an in-service training position. As it turns out, my waitressing position led to me meeting the person who would help find a position. That position ultimately led to where I am today.

My most recent fear though has being the fear of ageing. I turned 50 last Saturday. It’s a pretty big number and it can be pretty scary. I have spent the last 2-3 years working on accepting it. The hardest part has been looking in the mirror and accepting that I no longer look like my 25 year old self. There are lines forming around my eyes now and my jowls are looking…well…jowly…lol. I can see me face is starting to sag and it has been hard to accept. I love my grey hair though. It’s my favourite part about ageing. I have written about this in an earlier post but a few months ago, I made the decision that it is what it is and that what is in my control is accept the fact that I am ageing and to celebrate it by dressing up and just flaunting my 50 year old self. Why not right! I have also decided to take better care of myself so that I get to enjoy a better quality of life for as long as I am on this earth.

The result is that I actually love myself more than I ever have. I feel good and even though the weight has been stubborn, I think I look great! My friend was saying to me the other day that I look brighter and more radiant. I’ll take that. I follow like minded woman on social media who are comfortable in ther own skins at my age. I just unfollowed a lady who was sharing her minor cosmetic surgery yesterday. I don’t have an issue with it. It makes me sad to see the lengths people will go to to avoid looking older. It’s not possible to stop it but it is possible to look good naturally through the process. We are so blessed to live in an age where a lot of our female role models are choosing to age gracefully like Sarah Jessica Parker and Dame Helen Mirren. In South Africa we have Connie Ferguson and Thembi Seete. I have had the pleasure of being in Thembi Seete’s company for a very short period of time and I was so blown away by her energy and attitude. I want to be like her when I grow up …lol.

At the end of the day, by holding on to my younger self, I have not been able to appreciate and enjoy who I am today. Truth be told, I am a very different person today and I much prefer her to scaredy mouse I was back then. I must admit though that this new found appreciation for myself takes a conscious effort every single day but I am enjoying walking past a mirror and consciously stopping and smiling at myself rather hurrying past in case I see a flaw. It’s awesome.

Taken a week shy of my 50th birthday. Photo credit: Venetia Mitchell. Dress: Jaggery Collection

So Cheers to 50 year old me! Girrrl…You are amazing!🍾🥂

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Travelling…over God’s country

Bloganuary Day 14

Today’s Prompt: What is your preferred mode of travel?

I would definitely say the car! Road trips are my favourite.

When I was a kid, it seemed like we were always on the road during school holidays. My dad loved driving and loved visiting both his and my mum’s family. As a result, we would travel to Johannesburg from Pietermaritzburg where we lived, or to the farm or spend the day in Durban or drive to a small town called Harding in KZN. One year we even drove to Cape Town. It’s an 18 hour trip and I really don’t know how my dad coped with all our singing and chatter along the way. I was only 8 years old then and full of energy.

I had dreamed of taking my son on road trips too but it hasn’t quite worked out as planned. We did drive to East London in the Eastern Cape with my dad. That was a 6 or 8 hr trip and Alex sat like a trooper all the way there. He was only 5 or so when we drove down. He was so excited to get there that he didn’t even want to take a bathroom break until mother nature refused to take no for an answer.

The other trip I did take my son on was a trip to Johannesburg with my boyfriend at the time. He was about 10 at the time. We stopped at the smallest church in the Southern Africa at Van Reenan’s Pass. It is called The Landoff Oratory and you can read about it’s history here. It is gorgeous and is surrounded by the most beautiful landscape.

The Little Church. Photo credit: Michelle Frankson
The Coffee Shop next door. Photo Credit: Michelle Frankson

I think the things I love most about road trips is the quality time you get to spend with your travelling companions in the car, the scenery (South Africa is a beautiful country) and the journey.

Ooh the other little road trip that stands out in my mind was the drive from Trumbull, Connecticut to Weehawken, New Jersey and back. It was the end of September and the night time temperature dropped between trips so the trees were green on the way to NJ and on the way back, most had changed colour to the beautiful autumn shades of yellow and orange. It totally blew my mind!

I love flying as well. Most people think me strange but the take-off is my favourite part of the flight. I also love airports. I love that I am surrounded by such a mix of people nd cultures at any point in time and it’s always a vibe. I love flying because it takes me to such distant destinations which have different cultures to be experienced.

It has always been a dream of mine to let my son experience all the major forms of transport at least once. He has flown, taken a long distance bus trip to Port Elizabeth (once was enough!) and had a train ride to Inchanga although we need to do that trip again but in the steam engine. Next up is a cruise. My aim is for that to happen in the next year or two. We were supposed to tick that off last year but covid got in the way.

What’s your favourite way to travel? Let me know in the comments. I would also highly recommend follwing the bloganuary hashtag as I have read great posts on this topic.

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When I am a wealthy woman…

Bloganuary Day 13

Today’s Prompt: If you had a billion US dollars, how would you spend it?

Well! Imagine that! That is a serious bit of money! Which just reminds me…i forgot to buy my Powerball ticket for tonight🤦🏽‍♀️😂 Of course I wouldn’t need to buy one if I had all that money but I’d probably do it anyway just because I can.

Photo by John Guccione http://www.advergroup.com on Pexels.com

So what will I do? First things first, I will donate a 10th of it to Gift of the Givers. They are a charity organisation who do amazing work in South Africa as well as all over the world. They have helped the release of hostages, helped out at every major disaster around the world over the 10+ years and in South Africa. Their founder and leader is Dr Imtiaz Sooliman and he is based in my home town. He used to treat my mum when he was still a practising medical doctor. You can read about how a visit to Turkey sealed his fate and, if you are moved to, contribute to the foundation here.

I will also donate 10% to the SPCA. They do amazing work. I will also start a fund that would take of the needs of old people’s pets as it is exteremly expensive to maintain a pet in South Africa. A visit to the vet costs more than a visit to the GP.

Thereafter, I will definitely give my family and friends a share of it, especially those who have always been there for me. Then I will invest it so that my son and I can live a fantastic life travelling the world. I will make us visit every museum and classic little bookshop I can find and he will make us attend every F1 race and probably every car manufacturers headquarters as well.

I will buy a house somewhere in the world where I can see the sea and the mountains (much like one can in Cape Town) from my writing room. It will also need to have a beautiful garden that I can walk through and ground myself in everyday. Can you imagine the size of the library I will have!

Photo by Ricardo Esquivel on Pexels.com

My son will have whatever he needs which may not be same as what he wants. He will have to work for the things that he wants but doesn’t need. I will buy my dad his dream cottage by the sea where he can step out of his door and go fishing every day if he so chooses.

Lastly, well for now anyway, I will set up a foundation that mentors and perhaps sponsors South Africans who are motivated to make something of themselves. Age will not be a factor as not everyone knows what they want in their 20’s. If you have only found your purpose at age 70 and you are looking for support and guidance on how to make it happen, our doors would definitely be open to you. We so desperately need to make South Africa the place where dreams can come true in order to uplift our people and our economy.

So yip, that is just some of the things that I will do with my billion dollars. Nothing too fancy. Now note, I say and will and not would as it’s still very possible that I will be a billionnaire one day. I live in faith. Nothing is impossible.😉

Let me know what you will be doing with yours in the comments.

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Housework can’t kill you, but why take a chance? —Phyllis Diller

Well unless you are procrastinging an admin task, then housework is so inviting. Wouldn’t you agree? Well…that leads me to the prompt for bloganuary Day 12.

Today’s Prompt: What chores do you find the most challenging to do?

I have to admit that every chore is challenging when I think about getting started but once I get going, I actually enjoy what I am doing. Chores like ironing and washing dishes can actually be meditative. I sometimes also listen to music, a podcast or an audiobook while I am busy.

I find cooking and baking very engaging. Following that recipe, expecting it to come out the same everytime, and then finding that it seldom does, always boggles my brain. I swear I do the exact same thing every time but sometimes my food/cake is too dry or doesn’t have enough salt or too moist for example. Does the same thing happen to you? How does it happen????

Photo by Markus Winkler on Pexels.com

As a general rule, actually writing down targets/goals and OKR’s is a good reason to pull out all my procrastination tools. I will happily clean, declutter, iron and spit and polish any surface to avoid this type of chore. I call it a chore because it is not fun but it is necessary. I know what I want to achieve but articulating it on paper means actually getting specific and realistic about it and I want to achieve everything like yesterday! 🤦🏽‍♀️Once I am done though, I feel so accomplished! I feel like an actual professional 😂.

So yes, any repititive task that I need to do tends to be challenging however, once I get going I always end up asking myself “What took you so long!”. Do you have specific chores that you find challenging even once you get started or are you more like me? Hate it until you start. Let me know in the comments.

Bye bye for now. I’ll leave you with this quote by A.A. Milne. It’s sums up my home and desk 🤭

One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries.

A.A. Milne
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Defining Success

Bloganuary Day 11

Today’s Prompt: How do you define success?

It’s day 11 and I am tired of writing a post a post a day already but here I am. I guess in that respect I am already successful in maintaining a daily writing habit up until this point.

If I think about it, to me success is made up of at least 3 parts:

  1. Do what you say you will do.
  2. As Matthew McConaughey reminds us on IG- Don’t half-*ss it!
  3. Leave the world a little better than you found it when you are done even if the outcome is not quite what you intended it to be.

I’m going to keep it short and sweet today. Would you add anything further to those 3 parts? Looking forward to reading everyone else’s definitions.

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If you wish to renew your mind, read.– Lailah Gifty Akita

Bloganuary Day 10

Today’s Prompt: Has a book changed your life?

Those that follow my blog and those that know me, know that books are one of the great loves of my life. Every book that I read impacts my life in one way or another. It doesn’t matter if it is fiction or non-fiction. Every book counts.

If I have to choose 4 that stand out for me it would be:

  1. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho- It was the first time I had read about the Universe conspiring to help me achieve my dreams. It is also my favourite quote from the book. It planted the seed that I was still allowed to dream (I was in my early thirties when I read it) and that it’s okay if I have to go on a journey to achieve it. In a nutshell, it gave me hope when I didn’t realise I needed it.
  2. The Jewel of Abundance by Ellen Grace O’Brian – I read this book not long after my mum died. I was searching for meaning for my life and I also wanted to activate abundance in all its forms. I was in such a bad space by the end of 2018. It was a year of many losses. This book was recommended by Paulo Coelho on Twitter so I hoped onto amazon and bought the kindle version. It helped me understand what abundance is and it helped me bring spirituality into my life. I found a level of peace through this book. I think I need to go back to it because I need some guidance again.
  3. The Game of Life and How to Play It by Florence Scovel Shinn – This book is a metaphysical book but it made me look at the bible differently and help me understand it and grow my faith in God. I am not very good at reading the bible and there were certain perceptions that I had about it. I had many, sometimes heated, discussions with our priest when I was a teen and in my 20’s, about my perceptions. This book helped me see what he had been trying to tell me all along.
  4. The Surrender Experiment – Micheal Singer. This book helped me trust my instincts more and follow the path that it leads me on as well as to let go of the outcome. I have since figured out at that I still have a lot to learn about surrendering but this book opened my eyes to what it is and that it is ok if things don’t work out as I had planned them.

Have you read any of these books? Did you have similar takealots? Let me know in the comments.

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Gifts from the heart

Bloganuary day 9 (Holy macaroni we are almost through the first 3rd of January!)

Today’s Prompt: What is the most memorable gift you have received?

Sjoe it is hard to pin this down to just one thing. There are a few that stand out in my mind for various reasons.

  • A carved wooden bangle that my aunt had sent for me while she was still in exile. She was my favourite aunt, especially when I was a kid. She used used to give us the bag of sweets when we left the farm. You can read about it here. They had to leave in the dead of night without saying goodbye and without telling anyone in the family where they were going back in 1980 or so. We were devastated and for a long time we, the kids, were never told where in the world she and her son’s were for their safety. In approximately 1988, her daughter and her family were able to visit her in Botswana although she was largely based in Tanzania while she was in exile. Her daughter brought back gifts, one of which was this bangle that she gave me. I was so thrilled. I had missed my aunt so and it blew me away that she thought of me while she was away. I still treasure that bangle.
  • The pottery roses that my son created for me in his preschool class when he was 4 years old. They are so beautiful and he was so proud of them. He made them for Mother’s day. They stay on a shelf above my bed where I look at them every day. They were clearly made with love.
  • A card that my son made for mother’s day in primary school. He coloured it in in the brightest, most beautiful colours. It just looked perfect. The thing is that he hated colouring anything in from the time he could hold a crayon. His teachers would get so frustrated with him. For whatever reason, that year, he put his heart and soul into colouring that card so I really treasure it. I often remind him how much grateful I am for it and how much I appreciate how he put aside his hatred for colouring in to create such a beautiful card for me. He beems every time I tell him.
  • My younger sister had once bought me a beautiful wooden wardrobe jewellery box for Christmas. I loved it so much. It reminded me of how thoughtful her gifts always were. Unfortunately I don’t have it anymore as a few termites discovered it so I had to get rid of it but I loved that jewellery box and all that it signified about her.

Those are just a few of the very memorable gifts that I received.

Some of my most treasured gifts
My bangle from Tanzania

That’s it for today. Thanks for stopping by. Bye for now.

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Of Bloodlines and Origins

Bloganuary day 8

Today’s prompt: How far back in your family tree can you go?

I was so surprised that this was today’s prompt as, out of the blue, my son and my nephew both asked for access to our family tree this afternoon. Our Family tree was therefore top of mind for me anyway today. How cool is that!

We are very fortunate in that my Dad has spent the last few years delving into the history of our family, especially on his dad’s side as this is name we carry. Thus far he has gone as far back as the early 1700’s. On my mum’s side, we can trace my grandfather’s family back to the 1800’s as far as I know but we don’t know really know anything about my grandmother’s family.

We are of mixed race. On my dad’s side it is English and Zulu and on my mum’s side it is English and St Helenic. Somehere in the St Helenic line is Asian ancestory as the boys in particular in my grandfather’s family have Asian features. My mum inherited those feautues as well and passed those genes on to us as well. It is has far easier to trace the English bloodline than it has been the Zulu line. As far as I know, no records exist for the Zulu bloodline. I assume my mum’s mum still has family in St Helena as I went onto the website one day and I say a picture of a lady standing at her back door that looked so much like her. When I looked at the caption I was pleasantly surprised to see that she had the surname as my gran so it’s highly likely she is family.

As most of our knowledge is about my dad’s side of the family, I can only really speak to that. I must admit that it has been empowering to learn that we descend from ship owners on the one hand and a strong, courageous woman on the other. Unfortunately all my grandparents had passed by the time I was 10 and I never knew my dad’s dad as he passed when my dad was 16. My dad’s mum is the only one I got to hear stories from. She would have us help her fold laundry on rainy days and entertain us with stories of her school days. She was one of the first 23 students that attended the school where she grew up in the early 1900’s so it was all very novel to them.

The pics below were taken at the home of my Great great grandfather which, up until recently, was a snapshot of their life in the early 1900’s. It is also surrounded by a nature reserve so it is extremely peaceful. I have loved walking through the grounds. We’ve had to side step the zebras and, if we wanted to see the buck that roamed the grounds, we had to remain very still as they were very skittish. It’s also the location that I chose for our family portrait last year.

Coedmore castle. Photographer: Author
Posing with the Zebras. Photographer: Author
Understanding their history with Grandpa. Photographer: MFenner Photography

We inherit from our ancestors gifts so often taken for granted. Each of us contains within this inheritance of soul. We are links between the ages, containing past and present expectations, sacred memories and future promise.

Edward Sellner

I could go on and on about our family tree but i will stop here. I think it is so importnat and very empowering to know where we come from. We don’t realise that we all carry great bloodlines if we go back far enough.

Thank you for taking this walk through our family history with me. I hope you have enjoyed it. Bye for now.

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Rain

Bloganuary Day 7

Today’s Prompt: Write a short story or poem about rain

Oh My Hat! What a challenge! Since today is my 50th birthday and I guess I’ll start this decade off with something new. Here’s my attempt at writing a short poem about Rain. Here goes:

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
Rain falls.
Constantly, relentessly.
Pounding the windows, the earth.

Streams form. Rivers rise
Sand loosens.  Mud slides
Walls slump. Homes crumble.
Life fades.  Futures change.

What was is washed away 
What is is in ruins
What will be? What will be?

A new dawn.  A new day.
Sun shines.  Debris is cleared
A new earth revealed.  New dreams arise

Let me know what comes to mind and what you think of itl. Let me live and learn 😊

That’s it for today. Bye for now.

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Why do I write

Bloganuary Day 6

Today’s prompt: Why do you write?

I love writing! It’s taken me years to acknowledge and accept it simply because I didn’t think I could ever hold anyone’s attention with my attempts at writing but here we are. 💃

I wrote about this very topic back in 2017 which you can read here. I still write for the same reasons and, in all honesty, I don’t think I can write it as well now as I did back then.

Photo by Suzy Hazelwood on Pexels.com

“When you’re sharing, it offers the opportunity for someone to help you.”

Marala Scott

Thank you for reading my posts and sharing your perspectives on the things that I write about in the comments. You teach me to broaden my thinking and help me grow.

That’s it for today. Bye for now.

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Joy lives in the moment

Bloganuary Day 5

Today’s Prompt: What brings you joy?

Once again, my mum was my first thought when I read that prompt. Her name was Joy. When she passed, everyone would tell me how she brought joy to them through her smile. She always greeted everyone with a smile. Her baking was the other way she brought joy to people. She was a very talented baker and she liked to make note of (in her head), exactly who liked what cake. She always made sure she made a person’s favourite when they visited or she visited them. Of course, seeing the delight on people’s faces when she smiled at them and when they walked in smelled their favourite treat before they even laid eyes on it, made her light up. She was an introvert so she would try to hide it but if you paid close attention in that moment, you would notice her light up just a little bit. I think it is pretty cool that she deliberately did something to bring people joy every time they came into contact with her. She really lived up to her name in that respect. The thought of it brings me joy and inspires me.

What brings me joy are the simple things in life.

– Seeing my son light up when he is proud of himself or I am proud of him or when something good happens to him.

– Spending time with the cats that adopted us. They are such curious and innocent souls. Below is a video I created on IG. My son was movinga ball around with his hands and they were just fascinated. I added the song on IG and it just worked out perfectly! I was so chuffed!

Video: Created on IG by author. Music: I Feel Good by Pink Sweat$.

– Spending time in the company of toddlers and pre-schoolers. They keep me alert to, and appreciative of, the wonders around me.

– Listening to the bird’s conversation in the mornings. I really wish I could speak tweet and chirp. Their conversation sounds pretty hectic sometimes especially when they are shouting at each other😂😂

– Spending time pottering in my little garden and especially when all my efforts are rewarded with a new bloom.

– Books and the wonderful act of reading them. I am currently reading Game of Thrones. I love the way George RR Martin puts words together. It feels like I am reading a piece of art.

– I guess I get this from my mum, but surprising people with little gifts brings me great joy. Sometimes it’s the gift of an experience that they have never had before rather than a material object. Either way I always hope that I was able to enrich their lives for a short period.

– I will end with calling out writing as something that brings me great joy. I get so excited when I write so if everything seems a bit jumbled sometimes, now you know why.

These are just some of things that bring me joy every day. I hope you felt some of my joy just reading about them. Don’t forget:

The world is full of magical things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.

W.B. Yeats

There are lots of interesting blogs on each of the bloganuary topics. If you would like to read more of them, you can follow the tag here.

Thanks for stopping by. Bye for now.

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Lost treasure

Bloganuanry Day 4

Today’s prompt: What is a treasure that’s been lost?

The first thought that came to mind was my mum. She was a treasure to us and to many that she came into contact with. Her passing was a great loss to our family and to the community she lived and worked it.

There is another treasure though that also came to mind and that is our safety or perhaps I should say, our freedom. In South Africa, it’s often our physical safety and freedom. Like most countries, there are good spots and bad spots in every city and I try to keep to the good spots but there are still extra precautions we have to take like having burglar bars on our windows and having security gates on our doors and you can’t leave valuables in plain sight in your car. We therefore live in a state of constantly being on our guard which means that we constantly in a state of stress which can’t be good for us. I do believe that there are very few countries in the world where people are safe but I guess in SA, the risk of being the victim of a crime is higher than most especially in some areas.

I do believe that as wonderful as the internet is, it has made it easier for criminals to grow their networks and to get to us. It is actually so sad. I didn’t realise how vunerable we were until I read Jeffery Deaver’s book “The Broken Window” in about 2009. Although it was fictional, it was frightening to discover how our information could be manipulated and used if it lands in the wrong hands. While identity theft was always a possibility, criminals had to work much harder to get your information before the internet came along. So while it so much easier to connect these days and to share, how you put the information out there can put you at risk. This unfortunately is a global problem.

I will always take whatever precautions I can to hinder the criminals but I won’t let the fear of what could happen dictate everything that I do. If I did I wouldn’t have this blog and then I wouldn’t have met all the awesome people that I have over the past year especially.

That’s it for today. Bye for now.

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Teddy Bears and Geese

Bloganuary Day 3 – what a challenge!

Today’s Prompt: What is the earliest memory you have?

Well. I honestly don’t know what my earliest memory actually is. I do remember my tartan teddy which I wrote about last year. He got lost before I was 4 I would say but it was clearly a pretty tragic event for me because I still remember him very clearly and the pic is just proof that he did exist and i am not going mad ..lol

The Farm

Other than my teddy, I remember having an awesome childhood. We spent a lot of time on the farm where I ran wild with my cousins and had a ton of fun. I remember my gran taking my sister and I for a walk through the sugar cane on our way to the dam. We dodged a huge cane rat and a snake that was in hot pursuit of it on that particular trip. I remember my cousin and I being chased by geese. We were in tears and our dads were crying as well but for a very different reason. They were crying tears of laughter at our stupidity especially since they did warn us. 😂 Of course my favourite memory of the farm was sunday afternoons when we would stop at my aunt’s shop to say goodbye and she would give us each a little bag of sweets. Well, guess who my favourite aunt on the farm was…lol

The Flats

I also remember us living in the local council flats. There were lots of kids to play with and play we did. Michelle was such a common name then that there was a Michelle in almost every block. When the mum’s would come out and shout for us at the end of the day, the name Michelle would be heard most often. One of my clearest memories of that time was the day my mum asked me to sit on the stairs and wait for the ice-cream man to come. I was so excited. When he did arrive and my mum came out, the coins had all disappeared. Turns out I had put them in my mouth and accidently swallowed them although I did not remember actually doing it at the time and to this day. Needless to say, we didn’t have any ice-cream that day and it took a few more days before that money was recovered. 🤦🏽‍♀️ TV came to South Africa in 1976. I was 3 years old then. We didn’t have a TV then. When we moved to the flats, my best friend’s family lived below us. They would let my sister and I watch a programme or two in the evenings. TV programming only started at 6pm.

I don’t know if the same thing happened to you but I noticed that the memories I do have of those early years are memories that have a strong emotion attached to them. Some are joyful and some are created through a traumatic or fear-filled event. If I am not mistaken, this has been proven in a study somewhere along the way. I know that Tony Robbins also talks about doing things, especially with your kids and loved ones, that invoke strong positive emotions to create lasting memories of the experience for everyone. I guess it clearly works.

Thanks for reading. I hope you had as fun with the topic as I did going down memory lane. Bye for now.

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Being Brave

Bloganuary Day 2.

Today’s prompt: How are you brave?

I have been thinking about this question all afternoon. The Oxford dictionary defines the verb as enduring or facing (unpleasant conditions or behaviour) without showing fear. I think we all find ourselves in situations, and moments, in which we face unpleasant conditions/behaviour and overcome them without showing fear no matter how terrified we may actually be. These are just a few of the situations I have find myself in from time to time or daily were being brave is par for the course.

Being a woman

There is no doubt that being a woman in a man’s world takes a certain amount of bravery almost every day. Every time I walk out the door I run the risk of encountering a man who thinks he is entitled to cat call me, touch me/invade my personal space without my consent, ignore my inputs or belittle them simply because I am a woman or I am made the mistake of letting emotion slip into my response. Being a womansometimes needs courage in this world.

Being a single parent

Raising a child is not easy for anyone so if you are a parent, you definitely deserve a bravery badge. Raising a child as a single parent can require an extra bit of courage sometimes, especially since I haven’t always had a village close by to support me, let along a partner. Here’s the thing though, as long as I keep getting up each day and putting one foot in front of the other and crossing each bridge as I come to it, and have faith, somehow, just somehow, I manage to keep my son clothed, fed, safe, happy and feeling loved and appreciated. Yes I have had help along the way in the form of friends, family and very supportive managers at work, for which I am eternally grateful but when it is just the two of us at home, it’s all on me. Raising my son has being my greatest challenge and therefore taken the greatest amount of courage but I am so grateful for the opportunity.

Of course there are the challenges that come with not just being a woman but being a woman of colour in this world and those that come with just living in South Africa. The July 2020 unrest brought home just how quickly things can spiral out of control and the danger that comes with it. I don’t think there is single person that lives in KZN in South Africa in particular, who doesn’t still have a level of awareness of this danger in the back of their minds. Either we are brave souls to remain her or fools. Time will tell.

Lastly, let’s not forget the every day bits of courage that is needed to reach your dreams. As a hardcore introvert, I am terrified of public speaking. Last year I decided to tackle the fear head on so I volunteered to speak in big forums (ok it was online but they were still big forums). Phew, talk about being brave! My apple watch was even sending alerts that my heart was racing while I was talking…lol. At the end of it all, I was still standing. I was exhausted after each talk but I was still standing. With that episode in mind, the quote below pretty much sums up bravery and courage for me.

“Courage is about learning how to function despite the fear, to put aside your instincts to run or give in completely to the anger born from fear. Courage is about using your brain and your heart when every cell of your body is screaming at your to fight or flee – and then following through on what you believe is the right thing to do.”

Jim Butcher

This is quite a broad topic and I could go on forever but I will stop here. I would love to know your thoughts on the topic so I will be searching for the bloganuary + bravery tags to read through your blogs. Please feel free to add your thoughts in the comments as well.

Bye for now 🌷

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Would you have a great empire? Rule over yourself – Publilius Syrus

Bloganuary is back! I am so excited!

Today’ s prompt: What is something you want to achieve this year?

I am looking at my vision board and there is still so much that I want to achieve. I also know that none of it matters if I don’t have a good system in place. Discipline has been a weak point of mine but that needs to change. I say this every year but it’s definitely time. The one thing I therefore must achieve is the creation, and implementation, of a system that enables maximum output. This applies mainly to my writing but also to my day job. I think I’ll stick the following quote from James Clear’s book Atomic Habits above my desk as well add it to my phone’s wall paper:

You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems.

James Clear (Atomic Habits)

I feel that this is the single most thing I must achieve this year because the principles will be applicable to any area of my life that needs focus in the future. I will also prove to myself that I can do it. I plan on looking to the Stoics for help in achieveing the right mindset. I was drawn to “Discipline is Destiny” by Ryan Holiday in the bookstore before Christmas so I guess this idea has been brewing in the back of my mind for a while. This is also gives me confidence that I will succeed in my quest this year. 💃💃

Well that’s it from me. What would you like to achieve this year? I look forward to reading your responses in the comments. Have a prosperous 2023!

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The Power of Lipstick

Let me start by saying that I am in no way a stylist or a make-up artist or anything of that nature. I am your average ex-tomboy who has spent my entire life intimidated by make-up. As a result, the only make-up that is very hard to get wrong, is the only make-up you would usually find me in i.e. eyeliner and mascara and then it just became mascara because I just got so tired of having panda eyes…lol. This year though, I discovered the magical powers of lipstick and it was quite by accident.

My baby sister actualy introduced me to a colour that actually suited me. I owned quite a few lipsticks by then but none I felt very confident in. Then I discovered the Mac website and that I could try the lipsticks on virtually. I still didn’t trust my own judgement so I asked a male friend for his opinion and bought the ones he recommended it. I decided to wear one to work. I dressed up a little more for the occasion too 😉😂. I was blown away by the reaction I got!

I was greeted by people who barely greeted before. People would shout hello in the canteen and these were people who also barely greeted before. People took me more seriously as if I was suddenly a force to be reckoned with! But wait…there’s more…I walk into stores and the staff actually approach me now and I find that the level of service I receive is waaayyy better than before. I no longer have to wait too long for my orders to be filled in fast food places. Who knew that the addition of lipstick would make such an impact! Needless to say that my confidence levels have gone through the roof and I have officially become addicted to lipstick!

Me without and then with my favourite lipstick colour (Flat out Fabulous from Mac)

You can see from the pic above that it makes quite a difference. It changes my skin tone and just gives a more polished finished somehow. I have to admit that I am just blown away by the difference it makes. Anyway, I am glad I have discovered this new little magic wand.

I have also discovered a new benefit as well. I can now wear clothes in colours that didn’t quite suit me before. I have more of a warm tone but there are times when I like clothing that only comes in colours more suited to cool tones. It broke my heart when I had to just leave them on the rack in the store. Now I can wear some of them. All I need to do is wear the right colour lipstick with the top or dress and it helps to make me not look sickly. It’s important that the colour closest to your face suits your tone so lipstick is perfect. The tricky part is also making sure that the lipstick works with the colour of the clothes though.

Well that’s largely it. If you, like me, have been a bit intimidated by lipstick, I hope I have inspired you to overcome it and spend 2023 having a little fun creating new looks with it. I highly recommend trying the colours on virtually first. The actually lipstick colour tends to be slightly different when you buy it but it actually also tends to look even better than the pic.

Have fun!

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31 Days of Gratitude – Day 30

Hello Hello. Well, there is just 30 hours (at the time of writing this) left in this year for me. I am actually so exhausted today. I suspect it’s from sheer relief that my son is home. We hold so much tension in our bodies sometimes and only realise it when the source of our tension goes away. Even though I slept very peacefully last night, I think I was still a bit keyed up. I suspect tonights sleep is going to be even better.

My son and I went out for lunch today and to get his Christmas present. They didn’t have stock so he has to wait a few more days. Initially he was a bit grumpy about it but I reminded him that it was not a “No” but a “Not yet”. His mood changed instantly. My son has an old soul and for this I am very grateful. His level of maturity makes it easier for me to parent him. I also learn a lot from him because he has more patience than me. He is a real blessing in every way.

I also want to take a moment today to say thank you for my baby sister and her husband who ensured that I was not alone this Christmas. I realised today that between them, the cats, my cousin as well as a few friends and of course, everyone who has taken the time to read my posts and comment, I probably would have been miserable this December. Thank you all for making the time to interact with me and for keeping me occupied. I am so very very grateful.

I forget sometimes that even though my son’s dad and I weren’t close at the time of his passing, I did still care about him and we had actually started to build a partnership this year in particular that allowed us to improve how we parented how son. Alex knew that we had each other’s backs when it came to him so he was feeling pretty secure. My heart is very sore that he is gone. I am going to miss his support and his drama (he was very dramatic sometimes…lol). I have been so worried about how I will support Alex through this that I had forgotten that I need to allow myself to grieve as well. I still haven’t even completely wrapped my head around the fact that he is no longer with us. Perhaps that is why I have not really grieved as well. One day at a time I guess. I think if everyone had not kept me so occupied, I probably would have dwelled on Warren’s passing and gotten depressed so thank you again to everyone. I am so grateful. 🙏🙏

Photo by Vie Studio on Pexels.com

That’s it for today. I hope you are enjoying your eve of New Year’s eve 😊. Have fun!

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31 Days or Gratitude – Day 29

And he is home!!! I am so excited to have my son home again. I missed him more than usual this time. I guess it was because he was on the opposite end of the country. I am so grateful to his dad’s family for having him and for the experiences he has with them. He has now seen more of South Africa than I have which is just fantastic. 😊

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

I am also grateful that we made it home safely from the airport in the rain. I hit a terrible pothole in the road but fortunately I had slowed down beforehand so I don’t seem to have done any damage. Fingers are still crossed on that one. I’ll check in the morning. Hopefully the rain will have moved on by then.

Well that’s it for today. Always grateful to experience another God-given day. 🙏Hope you have a great one! 🌷

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31 Days of Gratitude – Day 28

Wow, these 28 days have really flown by. Usually I have no idea what else to be grateful for at this point in the month but this year I am realy enjoying the experience. So what am I grateful today? Well I have just returned from a Whitney Houston tribute show that I attended with a very good friend. We have had 2 outings together this month! That’s huge for us😂 so yes, I am very grateful that we got to attend the show together.

The show was awesome. The acoustics could have been a little better but it definitely did not detract from how beautiful and power the artists voice is. Her name is Belinda Davids. The show is called “The Greatest Love of All”. I didn’t get to see Whitney perform live but I’m sure Belinda’s performance is as close to the real deal as one can get. She really does an awesome job.

Belinda Davids performing one of my favourite Whitney Houston songs.

That’s it for today. Just grateful for another day on God’s beautiful earth. One more sleep until my son is home…whoop whoop 💃💃💃 Bye for now. Be blessed and have fun.

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31 Days of Gratitude – Day 27

6 more sleeps until the New Year and 2 more sleeps until my son comes home! I have lots to be excited about! My little desk also arrived today. This one will be dedicated to my writing. I am so gratefil that I will have a little writing spot which I am hoping will help me create, and firmly entrench, a daily writing habit. I am counting on Bloganuary to really kick start the habit again as well. I had so much fun with it this past Jan.

I also spent some time this morning listing all the things I did this year. I have made so many changes and pushed so many boundaries. I am very proud of myself and very grateful for the opportunities and the means to do it all. I had also promised myself that I would be intentional about certain things this year. One of which was to stop absorbing knowledge and spend more time putting what I do know into practice and sharing it where I can. I’ve done it but there is so much more to share so I will definitely keep this on my list for years to come.

Another item on that list was to learn to love myself a whole lot more and I am glad to say that I have definitely made progress on this one. These days my first reaction when I look in the mirror is to smile at myself rather than look for faults. I have changed the way I dress and I have discovered the impact and power of lipstick ! Phew! I have a whole blog post planned on the power of lipstick alone. Who knew!😜 All in all I must say that it feels good to like what I see in the mirror and I am grateful that I am able to make that switch and start appreciating and valuing myself more.🙏

Just me having a little fun at work

That’s it for today. I have finally started the Fire & Ice series of books by George RR Martin. I bought them in 2018 but only feel like I am ready to commit to them as of today. I am only 2 chapters in and I am enjoying his writing already. Ooh and my favorite part was officially opening the boxset and having the smell of a brand new book hit me. The highlight of my day 😁.

My reading material for the next few weeks

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31 Days of Gratitude – Day 26

What a peaceful day! Thankfully it was a lovely cool day so i was able to spend it under the covers with a good book. What a pleasure! I haven’t been able to do that in ages.

Tomorrow I go back to reality. I have to start exercising again. I feel like a slug😜. I also have a supplementary exam to prepare for which requires a lot of reading so I had better get started. I am really grateful for another opportunity to write this exam and plan on aceing it this time. It’s also time to seriusly start reviewing the year that was and make plans for the year to come. I am looking forward to this.

Lastly, I am so grateful for the cats that keep choosing to visit our home. Yes I feed them but I am aware that cats can just walk away when it suits them so I am very grateful that they still choose us. They have really kept me company this holiday. Today I put on a Youtube video for the kittens. They were running wild so I did it to calm them down. They were fascinated. I swear it’s like having a bunch of toddlers in the house when they pop in…

Kittens fishing. Video by Cat Games. Accessed on Youtube

Well that’s it for today. Hope you had a good one.

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31 Days of Gratitude – Day 25

Well, another Christmas is done and dusted. I must admit that I missed my son today but I am glad he had a good time with his Dad’s side of th efamily. I* can start counting down the days until he is home again. It won’t be long 🙂

I had a good Christmas with my family. It was filled with good food and great company :). I also stopped to see my cousin on the way home. Time with her is always treasured. Since I don’t believe in coincidences, this could only be the Universe at play. I had ordered a keyboard for my computer but the supplier couldn’t fulfil the order and my order was cancelled. Little did I know that my sister had bought me the one that I was admiring the last time we went shopping. 😁 I got my keyboard anyway! It was an awesome surprise!

I woke up to a storm about 5 this morning and it has rained on and off ever since. It’s been raining non-stop this evening so I guess we may have some flooding tomorrow. I am just grateful that I was able to drive from Pietermaritzburg to Durban in the rain without incident. There was so much water on the road. It was pretty scary. I am also grateful that my dad made it home safely too.

I hope that you all have had a really good Christmas as well. The countdown to the New Year begins. 7 days to wrap up this year and make it count if you haven’t already or to take the time to decide what your intention for 2023 is. Either way, I wish every success with it. Chat again tomorrow.

Image: Canva/Photogragh – author’s own

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31 Days of Gratitude – Day 24

It’s 70 mins to Christmas as I write this. It’s my last Christmas in my 40’s.😜 It doesn’t bother me though. I am really looking forward to my 50’s because I know that it will be my best decade yet! Knowing how many people who were my age or younger that passed from covid over the last 2 years and knowing that my son’s dad was only 43 when he passed from a heart attack, I see it is as an absolute blessing and privilage to reach this new milestone. I am so grateful to be here right now.

Messing around today when I realised it was my last Christmas in my 40’s

I missed yesterday’s post because I accidently fell asleep very early. I was exhausted because the christmas puddings were only done at 3am.🙈 That will teach me to not pay attention to the time before I start mixing. I was going to write about how excited I was because it was my last day of work for the year. It has been a long year with many ups and downs. I am grateful that I have made it through and especially for the lessons, the love, the people who have entered my life and for those who have left. It has been a good year overall.

I picked up my Christmas cake from my niece today. I buy one from her every year because she is a talented baker. This year she decorated it differently. It is so beautiful. I haven’t been able to capture how beautiful the shimmer effect is but I hope you get the idea in this little video. It was definitely one of the highlights of my day! Thank you Courtney! The other highlight was seeing her adorable son! He is such a happy little soul. She and her husband have done such a wonderful job raising him thus far.

That’s it for today. Thank you for joining me on this little journey through December. I appreciate your support. I hope you all have yourselves a very merry Christmas🎵🎶🎵

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31 Days of Gratitude: Day 21

Today I received a few surprises in my grocery delivery. I get a free product ever so often but today I received a free sample of a toilet cleaner as well as a chocolate and 3 Christmas crackers.😁 I posted a pic on my Whatsapp status and discovered that not everyone gets these gifts no matter how often they use the delivery service. Guess I am a pretty lucky lady! I am very grateful for my awesome surprises.

Well that’s it for today. I am super tired because I tidied up my son’s room a bit as it has been driving me insane. I am also having someone come in and clean tomorrow and I want her to actually spend the time cleaning and not to waste time tidying up. That room was in a state! I can’t believe how exhausted I am!😂

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31 Days of Gratitude – Day 18

How is it possible that we are now more than halfway through December??? In South Africa we call it Dezemba although even that name doesn’t quite capture what a vibe the country is during this month. It is sun, fun, surf and braai time. Lots of businesses close from the 15th until after the first week in January. Like I said, the entire country is a whole vibe in Dezemba!😜 This is when we relax and enjoy the company of our friends and family.

Today was part chill day and part declutter day for me. I managed to part with some of the junk that I have been holding on to. If I hadn’t touched it in at least 6 months, I decided that it couldn’t possibly be adding value to my life anymore so we parted ways. It feels so good to get rid of the junk. As I write this I am eyeing a shelf in my wardrobe that ahs bothered me for a while now. While it feels good to get rid of the junk, it is also a reminder of how abundant my life is in so many ways. I am grateful for this abundance.

I also found a pay slip from 10 years ago. I am grateful for where I am now and all I have. I just need to manage my resourses better. I know that there is so much more I can do with what I have. That will be one of my top 3 goals for 2023. I will find ways to do more with what I currently have.

Lastly, I am so happy for Argentina and especially Messi! Congrats on winning the 2022 World Cup! What a match! If I still smoked, I would have probably chain smoked through the last half hour or so of that match…lol. Awesome game!

Photo by Anna Shvets on Pexels.com
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31 Days of Gratitude – Day 15

Every December I am intentionally and publically grateful every single day. My aim is to end the year in a positive frame of mind and start the next on a high. Every December, between the 12th and the 20th, I get a pleasant surprise. I have actually had a few this year but today, I received a mail to say that my son had won a bookstore gift voucher from the a website I had subscribed to to help him revise for exams. He was not a fan but I asked him to do at least 2 worksheets every day to prepare for his final exams in particular. He complied and, for his efforts, he won a voucher. Hopefully this will encourage him to use the facility of his own accord next year. (I can dream…lol). I am thankful for the voucher.

I am also very grateful that tomorrow is a public holiday. I didn’t realise how exhausted I am until I stopped at the petrol station this evening and kept opening the petrol flap instead of the bonnet (hood) when the attendant wanted to check the oil and water. I was mortified when I realised what I was doing…lol. I will definitely just be chilling this weekend. I need to catch up on some reading as well.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
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31 Days of Gratitude- Day 14

Today was a good day. My son reached his destitation safely. Our team had a great afternoon together and certain things that had concerned me, fell into place. God just always makes a way. I am so thankful for His Grace. Lastly, it was just a stunning day in Durban today. Of course the thing that would really top this day off would be if Morocco wins their match tonight! I will defintely be praying for them and keeping my fingers crossed. It’s time for Africa (Waka Waka eh eh)! 🙂

A beautiful view from Umhlanga Ridge

My handsome actually let me take a selfie with him!
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31 Days of Gratitude- Day 11

A couple of things are going on in my world right now that require me to have a lot of faith in God. It always amazes and delights me to see His hand in action. I have to admit that initially I was trying to control everything and stressing about outcomes. On Friday night I just decided to let go and surrender to what is and whadda you know, today, things started falling into place. I am so grateful for this.

Photo by Brandy on Pexels.com

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31 Days of Gratitude – Day 8

Phew! Today was a scorcher. I have no idea what the temperature was but I can tell you it was hectically humid. To make matters worse, my fan broke the other day so I sat at my desk working while sweat poured down my face. I will definitely be going in to the office tomorrow for the aircon more than any other reason. I am really grateful that I have that option.

It was so humid that my glassess misted up instantly when I stepped out of an airconditioned store this eveing.

I am also grateful that I passed one more subject. That’s 2 out of 6 thus far. The 3rd, I have disputed because my lecturer claims I uploaded the incorrect paper and gave me 0% yet my screenshot of the upload shows that I uploaded the correct paper. I have done what I can to sort that out. The outcome I will leave in God’s hands. He knows what His plans for me are.

It’s been a long week. The end is in sight. The best part…I am still standing! For this I am grateful.

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31 Days of Gratitude- Day 7

The most important thing that I am grateful for today is that my son arrived safely at his destination. Thank you Lord. It is also t-31 days to the 50th anniversay of my birth! I am very excited to be turning 50! A whole new decade to look forward to. I wonder what fabulous surprises await me:)

As I look back on this year, I am also grateful for the things that didn’t happen. One of those being that I didn’t find a house that I could afford at the beginning of the year. Had I done so, I probably would be living on bread and jam right now to make my bond repayments due to the continous rate increases. God definitely had my back with that one. We also would not have gotten to meet the new kittens. There is one in particular that my son just adores. He calls him Lando.

My son and his favourite furry friend, Lando

With my son away, I get to have a little bit of me time which is a real blessing. I miss him when he is not here but I really don’t miss having to worry about what to cook for dinner every day…lol. I am definitely grateful for my me time.

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31 Days of Gratitude 2022- Day 4

Today I give thanks for all that I have. I wasn’t feeling 100% so I spent the day vegging, only getting up to make food for my son and I.

I am grateful that I have a roof over my head, clothes on my back, electricity to cook with, running water, internet for streaming, food in my cupboards and fridge and that I could take a time out without any financial consequences in particular. Thank you God that we have all that we do.

Most importantly, I grateful that my son and are in general good health. Health is wealth so I am grateful for our health.

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31 Days of Gratitude 2022: Day 3

Today I spent time with some of my favourite people on this planet. I met my sister for brunch and then surprised my cousin, who I like to call my sister as well, with a visit. I am so grateful that I got to spend time with them as I always feel reenergised thereafter.

Fun Fact: My sister and I live in different cities. Our bond appears to have gotten so strong over the past few years that we regular park opposite each other without even planning it when we meet at a mall or, like today, at a fleamarket. We only discover it when we are leaving. It just blows my mind every time it happens!

Lastly, I must take a moment to appreciate the beauty that surrounds us every day. I love the driving through Durban’s suburbs as well the areas on the outskirts of Durban. The landscape is amazing. Below is a pic I took while waiting in traffic this afternoon.

Shongweni, KZN, South Africa

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31 Days of Gratitude 2022- Day 2

Do you do also feel like after day 1 it’s downhill from there? That’s how I felt today. Suddenly it feels like I am knee-deep in December and Christmas is almost upon me and the year is virtually over and and and. Suddenly it’s all so overwhelming and I feel peopled out already. That being said, I have lots to be grateful for though.

Photo by Nicolas Postiglioni on Pexels.com

I spent most of my day with my son. It felt like old times. Pre-covid. It feel like he was a little kid again. I am so grateful that we had the time together. He lost his dad 3 weeks ago and today, for the first time, he shared some of memories of his dad with me. I was so glad he confided in me finally. It eventually got too much for him though and he clammed up on me in the evening again. I left him to just process the emotions he was feeling. I am so grateful for him. I am grateful for our bond. I am grateful for his trust and his love. I pray that God will give me the strength and wisdom to support him through this very tough period in his life and to help him navigate it.

Thank you Lord for my son.

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31 days of Gratitude 2022 – Day 1

Yip! It’s that time again and I am so excited. I hope you will join me as I spend the next 31 days intentionally being grateful for all that I have.

Photo by George Dolgikh on Pexels.com

My December started off with a rotten surprise but the day gradually got better. Today I am grateful for my job and the amazing team that I get to work with. We had a year-end connect today to reflect on the year that was and to enjoy each others company with good food and great music to enhance the experience.

I am also grateful for my new friend. She is an amazing person who is secure in her faith and love for God. Because of this, she is able to push her own boundaries knowning that God has her back. She inspires me to do the same and to strengthen my faith even more. God clearly works through her (well to me anyway) so I am so thrilled that He has sent her into my life. For me it is a reminder that He is not done with me yet. How exciting is that!

Thank you!

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Overcoming T2 Diabetes – An Update

I thought I would give an update on my quest to reversing this diabetes that I happen to have. The short update is that I am not there yet, in fact I am a little further away than I would like to be but I am learning a lot along the way.

Photo by Sydney Troxell on Pexels.com

Discipline has not been my strength

The reality is that if I just get into the habit of preparing my food over the weekends or at least the day before, I know that I will reach my goal a whole lot faster. Preparation is key and I have just not made the effort. One thing I have changed is that I do cook from scratch almost every day now. Prior to this I ate fast food at least 3 to 4 times a week. This actually created a new problem. My cholestrol levels were starting to rise. Thankfully, eating home cooked meals and lots of avos seems to have done the trick and I have gotten my readings back under control. Phew.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

I actually enjoy exercise

I had made a vow that I will achieve my vitality goals every week this year and I did up until last month when I was not well for a few days so I couldn’t exercise. Of course with the rising cost of living, a new gym membership was out of the question and I don’t want to spend on petrol where I can avoid it so I turned to the FitOn app. I love the diverstity of the workout types and intensities. I have my favourite instructors that I follow like Jeanette Jenkins who has such a sense of humour so I have a good laugh here and there while working out. Sadly, I haven’t lost a gram and in fact, I have gained a bit but I tell myself that is muscle mass as I can see some muscle definition peeping through my fat. It gives me hope that I will get there and who knows, maybe I will have a toned body like I did in my 20’s soon. I am clearly getting fitter as well as the workouts that took my heart rate to 80% -89% of my max heart rate a few months ago now only get me to 70-79%. It’s a bit of schlep because now I have to work out more often in order to achieve the same amount of points…lol. I now have to work out 5 times a week instead of 3 in order to achieve the max number of points I need for the week but this is not a bad thing.

Photo by u0410u043bu0435u043au0441u0430u043du0434u0430u0440 u0426u0432u0435u0442u0430u043du043eu0432u0438u045b on Pexels.com

Sleep is my friend

Don’t ever underestimate the knock on effect that a break in your sleep has on your blood glucose levels. A good night’s sleep is so important. Those nights where I have a broken sleep for whatever reason, always result in higher blood glucose levels in the morning.

So, while things have not gotten better, they have not gotten much worse but they definitely are not where I wanted them to be by now. The fault does lie with me and, at the end of the dusty day, it lies with my diet. There is no way around it. I have got to change my diet or I will not achieve my goal. I have to cut down on my carbs in order to reduce the amount of insulin I produce and the amount of glucose in blood ant any point in time. I have not stopped Intermittent Fasting (IF) by the way. I just eat way too often during my 8 hr eating window and too many of the wrong things. IF on it’s own is just not enough. It worked well initially because I only ate twice, max three times, in those 8 hours and I actually kept that window at 6 hours and not 8. I let a few bad habits creep in during lockdown that I am battling to shake. I guess I just haven’t committed to leaving them behing yet.

So that’s where I am currently at. I will succeed. In fact, you know what, I commit to succeeding. Snacking stops here and now. I am not a snacker anymore. That is no longer who I am. Watch this space for more updates 🙂 The news will be better next time.

Ciao for now!

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Money Mindset

Last night I was listening to a Marissa Peer talk about changing your money mindset. She does this hypnosis type exercise with you to help you identify the moments in your childhood in particular in which your negative beliefs were created. I cried when I was done with it. I could see so clearly where I had created beliefs for myself that just weren’t true. If you would like to try it for yourself, you can find it at this link. Carve out 30 minutes for yourself and go deep:)

Photo by Miguel u00c1. Padriu00f1u00e1n on Pexels.com

This exercise reminded me of Suze Orman’s book, “Suze Orman’s Financial Guidebook. Put the 9 steps to work”. I had used it almost 20 years ago when I found myself positively drowning in debt. I didn’t get through all 9 steps which is probably why I didn’t stay debt free but I did get through steps 1-3. Suze also believes in changing your money beliefs in order to change your financial future. I remember doing the exercises at the time and being shocked at how much I misunstood about money. While I accepted that I needed to change my money mindset and made the effort to do, I clearly did not internalise my new truths because, without even realising it, I slipped back into my old beliefs and started behaving the way I did when I got myself into debt in the first place.

So here I am, going through the motions for a second time. I am glad I get to do it all again because I think I am in a better space to get it right for good this time. I get why I have made the choices I have made and, I believe, that this time I truly understand what fears I need to overcome to make my new truths my reality from here on out. I cried again today going through steps 1-3. I cried because I was sad for the girl and the experiences she had that led her to adopt those beliefs. I cried because I am so relieved that I am no longer that girl. I am a woman who is worth so much more than that little girl realised. I am grateful that I was able to touch base with her today and let her know that it is ok to release those beliefs. That in her young mind she didn’t know how to see the experiences for what most of them were. Most of the time, people were doing their best that they knew how and it was never a reflection of her worth.

I know this is the right thing to focus on right now because even the version of the book that I have been searching for for the last few years just popped up as soon as I started looking. It was definitely not there the last time I looked. I had an American version and a South African version that my friend had bought me at the time. I had resigned myself to using the American version today when low and behold, there was my SA version instead :). I would say wish me luck on getting this right this time but I know I have got this so it’s all good!

If you would like to get your hands on a copy of Suze Orman’s book, here is the link. I would highly recommend it. Her system works if you work at it.

May you be happy

May you be healthy

May you be safe

May you live with ease

Loving Kindness Meditation

Have a wonderful week! Bye for now 🌼

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Weekly Reflections – 26/2/22

Reflection is a tool that is recommeneded by the business community as well as the self help community. I am sure we all do it but I have to say that most of my reflections have largely being about beating myself up about what I did or didn’t do that day or week. There’s no real benefit in that. This year, since “action” is my word for the year, I have decided to do it in, what I hope is, a more productive way.

Image: Canva

1 self-reflection

If the previous paragraph didn’t give you a hint, it’s that I am waaaay too hard on myself. Whenever something goes wrong, I tend to beat myself up about it. This week I witnessed more people having similar issues to those that I have had and it dawned on me that these things can and do happen to anyone. Even the most experienced in a field or some of the brightest minds that I have the privilege to work with/know. Sh*t happens. It is not about me but there are always lessons I can take from it. I don’t have all the answers and I never will. I just need to identify the right people who do have the answers I need.

1 thing I read

My book of the week is “The Psychology of Money” by Morgan Housel.

“I have no sunk costs” This was Daniel Kahneman’s response to Jason Zweig when he asked him how he could start again on a chapter even though they had already completed a draft. Morgan Housel defines “Sunk Costs” as anchoring decisions to past efforts that can’t be refunded. He also says that they make our future selves prisoners to our past, different, selves. How much do you hold on to because of the time or money you have already sunk into it even though it no longer serves you? This was a reminder for me to continue the physical and mental decluttering journey I have been on over the past few months. There is so much more I still need to let go of.

1 thing I heard

“The reason why a lot people won’t become who they want is because they’re too attached to who they have been” Lisa Nicols on Instagram. This relates to sunk costs again. I feel like the universe is trying to tell me something here ☺️. Guess I need to speed up the decluttering and letting go process. It sounds like the Universe has something good in store for me 😉

1 thing I saw

George and Georgina’s mum had more kittens and once again she brought them over to my courtyard. She must feel safe with us. It’s being awesome watching how much they have developed over this week. They started the week getting up on very shaky legs and playing with each other in slow motion and have ended it on stronger legs and a little faster and more agile. I am blown away at how they already know to groom themselves too. They are so gorgeous. And yes, I have asked our body corporate to have her spayed but until they do, my door is always open to her and her kittens.

Play time with big sister (she stole the box I put for them to huddle in🙈)

Sadly George ran off about 3 weeks ago. We miss him terribly but we can only pray that he is happy and safe wherever he is. Georgina missed him the most and has been terribly lonely but I see that she is now taking on and enjoying the role of big sister.

The last pic I took of George the day before he ran off. 😔

1 thing I am grateful for

I am blessed to have a home which is filled with love. I am blessed that my son and I can feel safe within it’s boundaries and that even a stray cat finds our yard a safe space for her and her little family. Thank you God for enabling this for us.

There was way more I learnt, saw and experienced this week but I will stop here.

I will leave you with a blessing a learnt this week:

  • May you be happy
  • May you be healthy
  • May you be safe
  • May you live with ease

Bye for now 🌼

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Habits – To Be or Not To Be

Creating a system to implement new habits has fascinated me for a long time. I think I have found the answer for me…

I am fascinated by habits. I am curious about how we create them and more importantly, how we make them stick. My fascination started 9 years ago when I became a non-smoker and was I was given a copy of “The Power of Habit” by Charles Durhigg. This was where I first leaned about keystone habits. Keystone habits are rountines/habits that lead to other actions because of them. As an example, exercise is often a keystone habit as it can lead to a change in eating habits and sleep routines.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

True behavior change is identity change.

James Clear (Atomic Habits)

I have been on a quest to become healthier for a while now and to be a writer. But I suspect that therein lies the problem. “Being on a quest to”, “trying”, “attempting to” – all of these thought processes never actually get you there. I have actually cut the word “try” out of my vocabulary. There is no such thing. Either you do or you don’t. So my word for 2022 is “Action”. I act and I do. Oh and the word healthier is probably part of the problem. Either I am living a healthy lifestyle or I’m not. I’m sure you can see where I am going with this.

The thing is that in order to become, you first have to be rather than become first in order to be. In other words , you have to tell yourself that you already are so that you take on the behaviour of that which you aspire to be. So in order to adopt healthy habits, I have to keep telling myself that I am a healthy person. The day after I made the decision to be the person I aimed to become, a clip of David Goggins popped up on my instagram feed talking about being the person mentally in order to adopt the habits of the person you want to become. He gave the example of a motivating yourself to run in the rain at 5am even when you have no desire to. He says you need to tell yourself: “This is who we are now”. That made perfect sense to me. So far it is working for my goal of writing every day. I have now written every day for more than 33 days straight because this is who I am now. I am a writer. I have so many other commitments every night but this is the one that I have enjoyed the most. To be honest, I am ususally dog tired when it is time to write but I do it anyway because…yip, that’s right,…this is who I am now. For the record, my last writing streak was for 7 days so this is very impressive for the old me. For the new me…this is my new normal. As for being a healthy person…well…I’m not quite there yet.

So this is my goal for 2022, to decide on what it is I want to achieve and be it. I am under no illusions that this will not always be easy but I know that if I am doing it for all the right reasons, I will definitely enjoy the journey. Watch this space and I will keep you updated on what’s worked and what hasn’t worked over the coming year.

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Star light. Star bright.

31 days of writing every day done and dusted. I am pretty chuffed with myself and with everyone else who made it through this month. Of course, the next challenge is to keep the momentum going. I will definitely publish at least once a week but the habit that will remain is to write every day. I hope you have enjoyed responding to the prompts as much as I have. Some were real head scatchers but we did it. (Whoop Whoop!) As much as I have enjoyed writing, I have also enjoyed reading so many blogs over the course of this month. I has really opened my eyes to how different people’s perspectives can be. I have also made some new blogging buddies and I look forward to maintain a good relationship with them at minimum. Thank you to all who have taken the time to read my posts, and like or comment as well as follow.

The final prompt for the month of bloganuary is “How do I feel when I look at the stars?” Hmmm. Usually, I feel in awe of the vastness of the universe. I live in the city so I don’t get to see the true beauty of the night sky very often. When I visit the farm however, I could lie in the grass and stare up at the sky the whole night. That is where the universe really off her beauty.

Sometimes, looking up at the night sky, I am reminded that I am but a speck on this earth. It’s a humbling experience. It is also a reminder not to take life too seriously. A nudge I need more often than not as a serious Capricorn. I also get very excited when I see a shooting star. When I was in my 20’s, I would often see shooting stars in a particular area at night when traveling on the freeway from Pietermaritzburg to Durban. My boyfriend at the time was usually driving. I have never seen shooting stars in that area since. I don’t know if that was the Universe trying to tell me “this is the one” and I was blind to the message or if I only saw them that often because I was a passenger and could focus more on the sky 😂. I suspect it was the latter since I have always been the driver since then.😜😂 Either way, I never missed an opportunity to wish upon those shooting stars. 😊

“When you wish upon a star, makes no difference who you are. Anything your heart desires will come to you.”

Jiminy Cricket

Well I guess that’s it for January. Thank you once again for your support. Have an awesome 2022!

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My sanctuary

Solitude is my happy place. I can be alone in a crowd and be happy much like a couple newly in love that creates their own world whereever they go. I used to be anxious about it when I was younger but not anymore. I love being on my own but within limits.

Photo by Skylar Kang on Pexels.com

My favourite place to be alone is in my home. It’s my haven. It’s where I can just be. No judgement. No minding my p’s and q’s. I just am. I love pottering around the house and the garden and then curling up with a good book. Now and then I will dedicate a weekend to a series on Netflix. I have to watch a season at a time or it will bother me. I can no longer survive on one episode a week. 🙈 Netflix has spoilt me. My son is at that age where he is glued to some form of a screen at any point in time but when he needs to take a break, he knows where to find me.

I also like enjoy chilling in my little garden. There is a bush behind my house that houses, what sounds like, a lot of different birds and there are lots of beautiful butterflies that flutter about. Even though I live just above a busy main road, the bush helps drown out the sound of traffic so I am able to focus on the birds singing in the trees. I never see them. I only ever hear them. I also enjoy watching the kittens have a blast chasing whatever insect crawls or flies by. They think my irises are their own personal jungle where they get to play hide-and-seek with each other. 😂 They are the cutest. Being in the garden is also my opportunity to ground myself.

So while I can happily be alone anywhere, my favourite place is definitely my home.

As much as I love solitude, I do need my daily dose of people though.

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Ageing Gracefully

At least that is what I tell myself😜. Today’s prompt requires that I write about my favourite part of myself. Well. Since I have done quite a bit of soul searching over the course of this month, I think I will stick to the physical today. In which case, my favourite part of myself right now is my grey hair!

Embracing my greys

I made a choice to embrace my greys about 2 months ago and I am so glad I did. It felt like a weight was taken off my shoulders. God decided that I would start sprouting greys in my twenties. I was having none of that. If He had blessed me with a ‘distinguished’ grey patch in the front like my mum had I might have considered it but noooo…He decided that mine would sprout up at random. So I made box colour my friend instead. (I don’t have the patience to sit in a salon every month and have my hair done). Such has been my life for the past 20 years.

In November my cousin became a gran for the 1st time. She is 4 months older than me. While my son is only 13, and will in all likelihood not make a gran for at least another 10 years (fingers crossed), it was a milestone that made me take a look in the mirror and ask myself who I was kidding. I am getting older (never old though, just older. There is a difference. 🤣) and I need to embrace it. With people dying at younger and younger ages thanks to covid, I decided it was a blessing to be the age I am and it’s time to embrace it. For me, the symbol of my ageing is my grey hair so I embraced it.

I don’t know about you but I find that once I make a decision to accept something, especially something that I have been dreading, I find that I actually like whatever it is. Does that happen to you too? It happened when I became a non-smoker. It happened when I began intermittent fasting and now when I chose to accept my hair. I no longer look at myself in the mirror in horror. Now I give myself a big broad grin every morning and blow myself a kiss because, gosh darn it, I deserve it. 🌷

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An interview with a Sock Elf

Me: Oh boy, oh boy, I am so excited to have ‘Fluffy’ (not his real name) the Sock Elf on my podcast today! Thank you all for joining us. Fluffy has agreed to let us in on the secret behind where our missing socks go hence the pseudonym. How cool is that! Thank you Fluffy and Welcome!

Fluffy: Thank you Michelle. It’s great to be here. As you know, no sock elf has ever revealed this secret before but I see the human’s distress and, even worse, I how the socks that get left behind are treated and my heart breaks for them.

Me: So tell me, how do you choose which socks to take and why?

Fluffy: Well, it depends on how the sock will be used in Elfville. Rule of thumb is to only take a sock that has been worn a few times.

Me: hmmm…well…sorry to interrupt you there, appears someone didn’t get that memo and took one of my brand new socks not so long ago. I was crushed!

Fluffy: I am terribly sorry to hear that. We will have to investigate. Anyway, as I was saying, the type and look of sock to be taken is dependant on the purpose it will serve.

Me: That brings me to my next question. How are they used by the Elf community?

Fluffy: I am so glad you asked!! There are so many fabulous things you can do with odd socks! That’s why I came on your show, I wanted to teach your listeners about the wonderful ways they can use sock that gets left behind. Let me give you a few examples:

  • Mittens: I know that is bitterly cold in the northen hemisphere right now, so I would encourage wearing your odd socks as an extra layer under your mittens to keep your hands warm. They do keep ours nice and toasty. We elves use the smaller socks to keep our ear tips warm as well.
  • Feet moisturisers – I love this one and you can do it all year round. We apply some vaseline to our feet or a nice thick cream and then put on our socks for soft smooth feet. We do it on our hands as well!
  • Keep your game pieces safe: we keep all our buttons, gameboard pieces, etc in our socks. This also helps us use less plastic as we are not using plastic bags anymore
  • Cleaning odd spots: we use socks to clean those odd spots like blinds.
  • Toys: The kiddie elves love the sock puppets that we make. We keep them entertained for hours with those!
  • Stinky shoes: our elf shoes are closed so it can get a bit cluncky in there if you know what I mean. We place some bicarbonate of soda in socks. Tie it up and place the sock in our shoe over night to absorb any odours.

Me: Wow! You guys really know socks! Thanks for the tips!

Fluffy: That is just the tip of the ice berg! We decorate our pot plants with socks and make colourful scarves and the like with them. Hmmm…Elfville should actually be called Sockville now that I think about it.

Me: Haha. There’s an idea. Thank you for coming on the show Fluffy. I don’t think I will ever look at an odd sock the same way again. I have to admit that I will always miss having a pair of socks coming out of every wash though.

Fluffy: Thanks again for having me. I know this doesn’t solve your initial problem but I hope that you and your audience will start having as much fun with your odd socks as we do! Bye!

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The Quotes I live by

If you follow my blog than you know that up until this year, I posted quotes almost daily. I find that they have the ability to uplift and motivate me and a lot of my friends and followers.. I have chosen the quotes below because they remind me to:

  • Have faith
  • Be present
  • Be grateful
  • God/The Universe is constantly working to fulfil my desires
  • Prayer changes things
  • Be still.

What are your favourite quotes? What quotes keep you motivated?

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