Category: Motherhood

When we pray we get out of our own way_ Gabby Bernstein 

I came across this quote in Gabby Bernstein’s book, The Universe Has Your Back.  While intuitively I knew it was true, I have always struggled to let go and let God.  In the last few weeks, it’s become a must. 

My son is in his final year of high school.  I have spent the year stressing about his marks and whether he will qualify for university or not.  In fact, everytime he ticked a box, I found something ne to stress about.  What I didn’t realise was that I was just adding to his stresses. He was already overwhelmed by the shear volume of work he was suddenly faced with and all the decisions he needed to make about his future. For the first time since his first term in high school, his marks plummeted.  My nerves!  Despite this, I have have decided to rather take a step back, get on my knees and let God take the reins.  

Since doing so, I am calmer and so is he.  In fact he seems happier. He even dances around the house these days and all this when he had a physics paper coming up. I have to admit that I was pleasantly surprised.  I don’t know what his trial marks will look like or even his finals, but I am working on accepting that the consequences (good or bad) are his to face. My job is to support him and help him find a path that works for him.

Clouds
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A few days ago, he accompanied his cousin to one of her nail clients.  The client happened to be a recruiter who gave him a feel for what the job market currently looks and the anticipated trends for the next few years.  (I believe that was God helping him along.) This has helped him give more thought to what he should study. I have downloaded a course on Udemy to help him get a feel for what the course material for his chosen field will be so that he can make an informed choice.

I have to admit that giving up control I actually never had in the first place, has not been easy.  Knowing that God will carry him through this helps a lot and I have to keep reminding myself of it every time I feel myself becoming anxious. I do also accept that the outcome may not be what I want for him.  Phew! This motherhood job is really not easy. 

 That’s it for today. Thanks for popping in.  Don’t forget to like and/or comment if you enjoyed reading this post, found it useful or have pearls of wisdom you would like to share with me and others. 

Everything is Going to be Alright

A few years ago, I was in a bit of a panic.  I couldn’t get hold of my cousin, who was going through a bit of a challenging time.  I was concerned that something had happened to her.  I called my uncle as I knew he had been in contact with her recently.  He is known to be a wise old soul, and he told me not to expect that something bad had happened.  Everything will be alright. It turned out she was ok, and had just had an issue with her phone.  There really was no need to worry.  My uncle had planted a seed.

The past two months have been quite challenging for me.  Our department at work went through another restructure 10 months after the last one.  I, once again, received a section 189 letter informing me that my role had changed significantly and I would therefore need to reapply for it.  There was a possibility that I could be retrenched.  I was once again anxious, but this time it only lasted for a week or two.  I got anxious because I have been a terrible interviewee in the past and dreaded going through it all over again.  I called a friend who is known to be the best interviewee in the team and asked for her help.  I felt a lot calmer after sitting with her and focused on what was in my control.  Certain events happened in the company that resulted in me not having to reapply for the job.  I believe that was God working in my favour and in the favour of a few other colleagues who had also faced losing their jobs and were now safe.  In fact, the outcome was better than I could have predicted.

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Another source of anxiety for me was my son’s eighteenth birthday. For whatever reason,  I was desperate for him to have a really good day. Once again, I focused on what was in my control, and everything else just fell into place.  He had a fantastic day!  I had focused on getting one event right that day, but God had bigger plans, and he ensured that my son’s entire day was amazing.  I was so happy for him and so very grateful to God for making it happen.

Since then, I have noticed a few other occasions or situations where everything has just fallen into place, especially when I just focus on what’s in my control.  There is really nothing to worry about, whether we want to believe it or not,  everything will be alright.  It often turns out to be better than you had envisioned.   My wise old uncle was right. 

Are you a bit of a worrywart, or have you learned to trust that everything will be okay?  What made you start believing that things will always work out? Let me know in the comments.

Thanks for reading.  Bye for now.

“Parenting teenagers is an exercise in letting go, while holding on with all your heart.” – Michelle Cruz-Rosado

Day 21.  Letting go with faith was definitely today’s theme. Thank you, God, that my son and his friend had an amazing day today, and thank you for keeping them safe as well. 

Two Things I Am Grateful For

  1. I am grateful that my son could add another new experience to his bucket list this year.  He had spoken about wanting to attend a Sharks rugby match over the last few months.  He called it out as a goal for next year.  He must have wanted it quite badly because God decided to move the timeline up.  I am also really happy that he was able to experience it with one of his best friends.  Of course, letting him attend without me took a bit of faith on my part.  A lot of alcohol flows at these events, so my only prayer was that they didn’t encounter any drunk people who were also looking for trouble.  Thankfully, God heard that prayer, too. 
  2. My son has been blessed with many firsts this year.  His firsts included a cruise, a trip overseas watching his favourite soccer team play at their home stadium, and even seeing amazing exhibits at the museum in London.  He saw some of the exhibits in his textbooks and was thrilled to see them in real life. He used to enjoy visiting the Pietermaritzburg Museum as a pre-schooler, so I was thrilled to know that he hadn’t lost his love of museums.  I am grateful to everyone, and especially God, for making all of my son’s new experiences possible this year.  He has really been blessed. 
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One Moment of Joy

Just having my son home again has been a real joy.  I have barely seen him today but it doesn’t matter.  What matters is that he is sleeping in his own bed tonight.  Tomorrow, he is off again, so once again, I have to loosen the reins and have faith that he will be ok and enjoy his time away.  When he was younger, I used to worry that he would enjoy his time away from me so much that he wouldn’t want to come back home.  How much more self-absorbed and insecure could I be!🫣 I know better now.  I know now that while he might not miss me when he goes away because he is enjoying the moment, he will always love me as much as he always has, and he will always be grateful to be home when he returns.  I guess I am also just preparing myself for the day he goes to university.  I only have two more years with him at home.  

Well, that’s it from me today.  Thanks for popping by.

Bye for now.