Lost treasure

Bloganuanry Day 4

Today’s prompt: What is a treasure that’s been lost?

The first thought that came to mind was my mum. She was a treasure to us and to many that she came into contact with. Her passing was a great loss to our family and to the community she lived and worked it.

There is another treasure though that also came to mind and that is our safety or perhaps I should say, our freedom. In South Africa, it’s often our physical safety and freedom. Like most countries, there are good spots and bad spots in every city and I try to keep to the good spots but there are still extra precautions we have to take like having burglar bars on our windows and having security gates on our doors and you can’t leave valuables in plain sight in your car. We therefore live in a state of constantly being on our guard which means that we constantly in a state of stress which can’t be good for us. I do believe that there are very few countries in the world where people are safe but I guess in SA, the risk of being the victim of a crime is higher than most especially in some areas.

I do believe that as wonderful as the internet is, it has made it easier for criminals to grow their networks and to get to us. It is actually so sad. I didn’t realise how vunerable we were until I read Jeffery Deaver’s book “The Broken Window” in about 2009. Although it was fictional, it was frightening to discover how our information could be manipulated and used if it lands in the wrong hands. While identity theft was always a possibility, criminals had to work much harder to get your information before the internet came along. So while it so much easier to connect these days and to share, how you put the information out there can put you at risk. This unfortunately is a global problem.

I will always take whatever precautions I can to hinder the criminals but I won’t let the fear of what could happen dictate everything that I do. If I did I wouldn’t have this blog and then I wouldn’t have met all the awesome people that I have over the past year especially.

That’s it for today. Bye for now.

Teddy Bears and Geese

Bloganuary Day 3 – what a challenge!

Today’s Prompt: What is the earliest memory you have?

Well. I honestly don’t know what my earliest memory actually is. I do remember my tartan teddy which I wrote about last year. He got lost before I was 4 I would say but it was clearly a pretty tragic event for me because I still remember him very clearly and the pic is just proof that he did exist and i am not going mad ..lol

The Farm

Other than my teddy, I remember having an awesome childhood. We spent a lot of time on the farm where I ran wild with my cousins and had a ton of fun. I remember my gran taking my sister and I for a walk through the sugar cane on our way to the dam. We dodged a huge cane rat and a snake that was in hot pursuit of it on that particular trip. I remember my cousin and I being chased by geese. We were in tears and our dads were crying as well but for a very different reason. They were crying tears of laughter at our stupidity especially since they did warn us. 😂 Of course my favourite memory of the farm was sunday afternoons when we would stop at my aunt’s shop to say goodbye and she would give us each a little bag of sweets. Well, guess who my favourite aunt on the farm was…lol

The Flats

I also remember us living in the local council flats. There were lots of kids to play with and play we did. Michelle was such a common name then that there was a Michelle in almost every block. When the mum’s would come out and shout for us at the end of the day, the name Michelle would be heard most often. One of my clearest memories of that time was the day my mum asked me to sit on the stairs and wait for the ice-cream man to come. I was so excited. When he did arrive and my mum came out, the coins had all disappeared. Turns out I had put them in my mouth and accidently swallowed them although I did not remember actually doing it at the time and to this day. Needless to say, we didn’t have any ice-cream that day and it took a few more days before that money was recovered. 🤦🏽‍♀️ TV came to South Africa in 1976. I was 3 years old then. We didn’t have a TV then. When we moved to the flats, my best friend’s family lived below us. They would let my sister and I watch a programme or two in the evenings. TV programming only started at 6pm.

I don’t know if the same thing happened to you but I noticed that the memories I do have of those early years are memories that have a strong emotion attached to them. Some are joyful and some are created through a traumatic or fear-filled event. If I am not mistaken, this has been proven in a study somewhere along the way. I know that Tony Robbins also talks about doing things, especially with your kids and loved ones, that invoke strong positive emotions to create lasting memories of the experience for everyone. I guess it clearly works.

Thanks for reading. I hope you had as fun with the topic as I did going down memory lane. Bye for now.

Being Brave

Bloganuary Day 2.

Today’s prompt: How are you brave?

I have been thinking about this question all afternoon. The Oxford dictionary defines the verb as enduring or facing (unpleasant conditions or behaviour) without showing fear. I think we all find ourselves in situations, and moments, in which we face unpleasant conditions/behaviour and overcome them without showing fear no matter how terrified we may actually be. These are just a few of the situations I have find myself in from time to time or daily were being brave is par for the course.

Being a woman

There is no doubt that being a woman in a man’s world takes a certain amount of bravery almost every day. Every time I walk out the door I run the risk of encountering a man who thinks he is entitled to cat call me, touch me/invade my personal space without my consent, ignore my inputs or belittle them simply because I am a woman or I am made the mistake of letting emotion slip into my response. Being a womansometimes needs courage in this world.

Being a single parent

Raising a child is not easy for anyone so if you are a parent, you definitely deserve a bravery badge. Raising a child as a single parent can require an extra bit of courage sometimes, especially since I haven’t always had a village close by to support me, let along a partner. Here’s the thing though, as long as I keep getting up each day and putting one foot in front of the other and crossing each bridge as I come to it, and have faith, somehow, just somehow, I manage to keep my son clothed, fed, safe, happy and feeling loved and appreciated. Yes I have had help along the way in the form of friends, family and very supportive managers at work, for which I am eternally grateful but when it is just the two of us at home, it’s all on me. Raising my son has being my greatest challenge and therefore taken the greatest amount of courage but I am so grateful for the opportunity.

Of course there are the challenges that come with not just being a woman but being a woman of colour in this world and those that come with just living in South Africa. The July 2020 unrest brought home just how quickly things can spiral out of control and the danger that comes with it. I don’t think there is single person that lives in KZN in South Africa in particular, who doesn’t still have a level of awareness of this danger in the back of their minds. Either we are brave souls to remain her or fools. Time will tell.

Lastly, let’s not forget the every day bits of courage that is needed to reach your dreams. As a hardcore introvert, I am terrified of public speaking. Last year I decided to tackle the fear head on so I volunteered to speak in big forums (ok it was online but they were still big forums). Phew, talk about being brave! My apple watch was even sending alerts that my heart was racing while I was talking…lol. At the end of it all, I was still standing. I was exhausted after each talk but I was still standing. With that episode in mind, the quote below pretty much sums up bravery and courage for me.

“Courage is about learning how to function despite the fear, to put aside your instincts to run or give in completely to the anger born from fear. Courage is about using your brain and your heart when every cell of your body is screaming at your to fight or flee – and then following through on what you believe is the right thing to do.”

Jim Butcher

This is quite a broad topic and I could go on forever but I will stop here. I would love to know your thoughts on the topic so I will be searching for the bloganuary + bravery tags to read through your blogs. Please feel free to add your thoughts in the comments as well.

Bye for now 🌷