“Time is the most valuable thing that a man can spend.” — Diogenes

What is the greatest gift someone could give you?

This a great question. I have been reading through many of the answers and am so fascinated that most writers have not mentioned material gifts. Instead, they have spoken about emotive gifts like time, love, respect and appreciation. Material gifts are always welcome for me, especially as a single woman. I most often have to spoil myself as there are not too many people thinking of spoiling me. That is not the greatest gift that someone could give me, though. Much like the gift I appreciate the most is time, but not just time, time for me when I need you to be available.

Image: Canva

I know it sounds a little odd, but it is borne out of my recent experience. I had made a new friend online, and we got on very well, or so I thought. The strangest thing was that I could never reach them when I wanted to chat. I could message them, and they would message me back as and when it suited them. Sometimes, it would be almost a day later. In the end, it got so bad that the only way to have a conversation with them was to wait until they messaged me and catch them mid-type. It was so weird, so as you can imagine, the friendship didn’t last. I never realised how important that was to me before. My long-time friends will always either respond immediately or as soon as they possibly can, so I have never had to think about it.  Our relationships are reciprocal. This was such a weird situation that I am still trying to wrap my head around it. The person did have control issues but this was control on another level.

The other special gift you can give me is to be yourself and accept me as I am. I get uncomfortable when someone tries to change me by judging me. There is a difference between trying to change someone into what you want them to be and trying to help someone grow. I am very open to the latter. The former is a no for me.

That’s it from me for today. Let me know what the greatest gift you would like to receive is.

“Life is more fun if you play games.” – Roald Dahl

Do you play in your daily life? What says “playtime” to you?

Hello Hello! Hmmm…good question Bloganuary. I do play in my daily life. All work and no play makes Michelle a dull girl after all. Play takes several forms for me and which I choose depends on my frame of mind at the time.

  • Online Scrabble – I have been playing this for about 14 years. I love that it has a chat feature. I have made a good few friends over the years. Most are based in the UK. This is my go to game when I need a distraction. It’s not mindless and I am learning new words and strategies all the times.
  • Vegging in front of the TV – This is new for me. I am not a TV person, but I do have a few favourite programmes like Law & Order, Bosch, Reacher and Friends (my son and I can watch that show over and over again). My new favourites are the documentaries on Netflix. I really enjoyed the one on Arnold Schwarzenegger (phew, that took a few attempts to get the spelling right😅). I found it very inspiring. His story reminds us that anything is possible if you choose it to be and set your mind to it.
  • Reading – Books are my forever companions. A fully loaded Kindle and a solar-powered power bank would be a must if you were to leave me on a desert island. :).
  • Coffee with friends – I have very few friends, and they are worth more than their weight in gold. They help me see life from different perspectives and they soothe my soul.
  • Shopping - I looove shopping although I don’t shop as often as I used to and won’t be this since my word for the year is “less”. I enjoy the thrill of acquiring items of beauty for my home that will make me look good or even a new book. I can spend hours in a bookshop just browsing. I very seldom leave empty-handed, too. I must buy at least one book.
  • Spending time with my son – This always soothes my soul. He spends most of his time playing games these days, so I don’t get to spend as much time with him as I used to. As a result, I treasure the moments that I do get.

How do you define play? How do you play?

Image: Canva

Less

That’s my word for the year. I have been looking around me for the past few weeks, and all I see is stuff. My wardrobes and cupboards are overflowing. My inboxes are overflowing. My folders are overflowing. There is just too much “overflowing” going on around me.

Image: Canva

That is not the only reason I want to have less of everything. I want to have less because I want to focus on the things and people in my life that will bring me more. More enrichment, more growth, more enjoyment, more experiences, more fulfilment, more fun and more focus…I guess you get the picture.

I am very grateful that I have been blessed with the means to accumulate all that, but I have definitely lost my way. I have accumulated largely for the sake of accumulating things and because I can sometimes, though, my bank balance takes some strain. 

The issue with accumulating stuff, responsibilities and projects is that you can quickly lose sight of the things that are important to you. There are areas of my life that run me because of this lack of focus which is not on. It is time to take back the areas I can control, like my finances and my home, for example. I have spent so much time, money and effort into my education that I have let the maintenance of my home slip. I have allowed so many little things that need fixing to accumulate. I don’t know about you, but I also find it quite stressful when things don’t work correctly, so fixing it all will lead to less stress.

Clearing the clutter also adds energy to a space, or at least that is how it makes me feel. The same is true for clearing the mental and digital clutter. I feel rejuvenated and more alive when I step into a cleared space. I must admit that if I have done too good a job clearing a room, I feel a little lost in the space. 

There are two areas that I will find the most difficult to clear: my bookcases and my clothes. I will have to come to terms with the fact that there are quite a few of each that I have to release for someone else’s enjoyment. I may never get to read/wear them, and that’s okay.

This is just one of my bookcases that is screaming for help 😱

I have tried physically decluttering before, but the clutter has somehow found its way back. I have come to the conclusion that it’s because I didn’t have a “why” that resonated with me each time I did it. I just did it because, at that point, I was tired of the clutter and wanted a clear space. This time, I know why I want to do this, and I am clear on the benefits for me and my son. I am clear on how to restructure the space to achieve my desired benefits.

Transformation takes time. This has been my other downfall previously. I had lacked patience with the process. I end up accepting a lower standard just to see a difference. So, in 2024, there will also be less rushing and lots more patience. 

So, I am looking forward to a clearer and more focused year. Less for More in 2024!

Thank you for walking with me through 2023! May your 2024 be blessed.

Do you have a word or phrase for the year to come?