Celebrating 2023: A Month of Gratitude – Day 18

The author appreciates the positive impacts that her father, son, and a friend, Dan, have had on her life. Their influences have shaped her sense of self, empowerment, and understanding of men.

Daily writing prompt
Describe a man who has positively impacted your life.

Since this is my month of gratitude, this prompt was right up my alley. There are a few men who have positively impacted my life. There’s my father, my son (even though he isn’t quite a man yet), and a friend who was clearly in my life for a reason and is no longer around, to name a few. Let’s start with my dad.


My Dad


Before my son’s arrival, no person loved me unconditionally like my dad did. What I do doesn’t matter; even if I disappoint him terribly, I am loved. What more could I ask of any human being. My dad is a gentle, loving soul who has a good heart. He finds his purpose in doing things for others. He is not all sparkle and fairy dust, though. He was very strict with us when we were kids and had quite a temper. Although he only hit my sister and me once each, and he couldn’t bear the pain he caused us, he never ever hit us again. He is very quiet and loves to read. All the second-hand booksellers in the area know me because I am constantly buying him books to read. He loves history and is our family’s genealogist. From him, I learnt that “this too shall pass”, that I can do anything I put my mind to and that being a woman is not a reason to let anyone hold me back. He has taught me what it feels like to be loved unconditionally and what it means to be of service to others. I am so grateful to call him Dad.


My Son


My son is a gift that I thank God for every day. He is an old soul and, therefore, a wise soul. He has taught me to appreciate the little things in life and who I am. I have watched him evolve through each stage of his life, and I marvel at how quickly things change. This year, I have watched him grow from an angry young person trying hard to be brave to a calmer, more mature young man. He inspires me to want to be better and to set an example for him. Each time he raises his game, I am inspired to raise mine even further. I could not have asked for a more wonderful son. I am very grateful for him.
The other thing that my son has taught me is that males are indeed a different ball game altogether. I do not have any brothers, so I only experienced males as friends and, of course, as boyfriends. I used to get so frustrated with my boyfriends about how they viewed life and behaved. I had a terrible habit of always picking weirdos for boyfriends. Having a son has taught me that they were not weirdos; they were just boys being boys. Now that I know that, I can live with it. Thank you, my child, for teaching your mum to appreciate men as they are.


My Friend, Dan


Dan came into my life a few months ago. It was very unexpected, and we just clicked. He is a fascinating, very well-rounded guy who lives on another continent. He has experience as a teacher, and he finds his purpose in creating programs to help kids overcome whatever difficulties they may be facing. I truly believe God sent him to me because He knew I needed help with my son. The funny thing is that Dan doesn’t believe in God, and I understand why he doesn’t, but it didn’t stop God from working through him.
Spirituality teaches us that if we want others to change their behaviour, we must change ours first, and they will respond in time. I was so wrapped up in thinking that there was something wrong with my child that I started to feel powerless to change the situation. Dan helped me see that there was nothing wrong with my son and that I needed to change his behaviour when he became angry. This turned everything around far sooner than I expected. I am so grateful for his help in changing my perspective about my son. He also appreciated me in such a way that I liked who I saw when I viewed myself through his eyes. Through his eyes, I realised that I already am the person I aspired to be and that I am ready to evolve to the next version of me. I am so grateful to him for this insight.


I wouldn’t be who I am today if it was not for each of these men. Who are the men in your life that have brought a positive change?

Thanks for reading! Be blessed!

History was made in my time

What major historical events do you remember?

I have walked this earth for 50 years. So many major historical events have taken place over this time.

Let me start back in 1981. The Royal Wedding. I was in grade 3 and we were so excited. My teacher had brought a TV to school so that we could watch. It was like watching a fairytale come to life,

I remember the newspaper reports detailing the sheer euphoria of the fall of the Berlin Wall in 1989. It blew everyone’s minds!

In February 1990, it was South Africa’s turn! Nelson Mandela was released from prison. I was in matric (grade 12) and suddenly the world was my oyster. I remember my friend and I going to Wimpy (a family restaurant chain) as often as possible because now we could actually sit inside the restaurant and eat. The following year, I was able to attend what was traditionally a white’s only tertiary institution. It was fascinating to go to class with people of different races all of I sudden.

I remember standing in the queue with my mother to cast my vote on the 27th April 1994. It was a sunny day. I voted at the voting station in the suburb where I grew up. It was so exciting to be a part of history! I remember seeing the long winding queues at voting stations around the country on TV that day. . It was an amazing day. Democracy had officially arrived in South Africa. I have voted in every election since because I treasure this very precious right to vote that so many fought and died for.

Do you remember where you were on September 11 2001? I was at work. It was after 3pm and my boyfriend called to tell me that a plan had hit the towers. Then he called to say a second plan had hit. He was at home sitting mesmerised in front of the tv. I got home before the towers collapsed. We, like the rest of the world, were in shock. We were horrified at what had just happened. I think the horror of that event is seared in our collective memories.

I’ll end with that truly sad day on the 31st August 1997 when the news broke that Princess Diana had died. It was a cold, wet Sunday morning. Our hearts were broken. The beautiful fairytale princess of my childhood was no more.

This is just a taste of those historical events that are imprinted in my memory. No doubt there will be lots more to come. What events have been imprinted on your memory?