This afternoon, I watched a programme on Netflix that featured amazing visuals of some of the cities I have always wanted to visit in Europe. It made me sit up and question why I haven’t fulfilled this dream yet and what I am going to do now to make it happen. For some reason, I felt like I had woken up from a coma. I don’t know what the answer is, but I do know what I want. Clarity is liberating.
Image created on Canva
I am also grateful today for the rest I have had ove the past two days in particular. I feel more enegised and my head feels a little clearer. I have also been trying to eat healthier these past two days, so that might also be playing a role.
I tried a recipe from a new keto book that I bought recently. It was just bangers and cauli mash with an onion gravy. It tasted good and it was definitely the onion gravy that made the dish. I had a good laugh, though, when I compared my finished dish to the picture in the book. God bless food photographers for making food look so good that it motivates us to cook. My food looked so bland and boring compared to the book’s pic. Thank goodness for the tasty onion gravy because, visually, my dish did not appeal at all. 🤪
My food vs the book. They must have used a colourant to get it looking that good.
That’s my story for today. I hope you enjoyed yours.
I know right! Where has the year gone? On the bright side, it means we still have 95 days left (at the time of writing this) to achieve the goals we set for 2024. It doesn’t sound like much, but it’s enough time to close off what you have started, at least.
I have been reviewing my year thus far and I have to say that it hasn’t been too bad of a year. 2024 is my year of Less. Most importantly for me, I needed to declutter my home. I am thrilled to say that I am about 70% of the way there. My kitchen countertops are clear. My dining room area is clear (most days at least. What is it about table tops that attracts life’s bits and bobs? 🤷🏽♀️) My lounge is looking neater and I finally figured out how to keep all the electrical cords out of site. I hate to say it but I do need to get rid of some of my books as I am never going to read them all. The sight of them overwhelms me sometimes. Next in line: my wardrobes.
Tough love is Tough!
Raising a teen is a challenge like no other. This past school term has been a push to get my son’s marks up. I think he forgot what he is capable of. I had to set strict boundaries to get him focused throughout the term. The hardest part of tough love is the toll it takes on the person giving it. I have always hated saying no to my son, but I also accepted that there were times when no was the only answer. This term was a term of an almost constant stream of “no”. It broke my heart to have to do it and to see the frustration and disappointment in his eyes. At the end of the day, it was all worth it, and even he couldn’t believe some of the marks he achieved. He was so thrilled that he couldn’t wait to get to the car with his report, so he called me and told me about his marks as he walked the few 100m to the car. I was so happy for him and very relieved that his hard work had paid off.
Working and Learning
At work, I have learned to look at things with a marketer’s eyes. Letting go of my technical mindset and methods for doing things has been tough. I am not there yet but I am grateful for the opportunity to grow in this manner. The one thing I have also had to learn is that, even though I am changing the way I look at things or articulate them, I must not doubt my instincts. It is so easy to doubt yourself when learning something new.
Tea is my New Best Friend
My health has been on a bit of a rollercoaster ride this year. I have finally lost most of the weight I had gained this year. My blood sugar is getting back to a good space. My cholesterol has been looking good, but my blood pressure has suddenly jumped up this year. Thankfully, it was almost back to normal this week, but I will keep monitoring it. I have reduced my caffeine intake as a start and am enjoying trying out new caffeine-free teas. Right now I am alternating between rooibos, rose petal and vanilla tea, chamomile tea and ginger tea. The rose tea and chamomile tea are definitely smoother, so I have them at night or when I feel stressed. The rooibos is more earthy in flavour and it seems to also curb my snacking habit. I need to monitor this a bit more to see if it really is helping. Ginger is supposed to aid digestion so I drink it after a meal.
6 Years into my New Reality – an Update
Lastly, this week, it was six years since my mum crossed over. Looking back, I am amazed at how much I have changed since it happened:
I am no longer drawn to articles and books on how to grow my confidence. I am a whole lot more confident in myself.
I am more aware of my strengths, and I spend my time trying to grow them. Right now I am drawn to mental models and strategic thinking.
I have clearer boundaries in most areas of my life.
My faith has grown stronger. I find it easier to let go of people and things that do not positively serve me or my son.
Most importantly, I know who I am.
I still struggle with committing to/focusing on one thing, but I am aware of it which is a step in the right direction. As Dr Phil says, “you can’t change what you don’t acknowledge”. I will continue to chip away at this block until it is no more.
Cheers to the end of another successful quarter! Photograph: Author’s own
So, it’s 88 days to Christmas. I must admit that I have started eyeing new Christmas ornaments in the stores even though I know I have too many already. Note to self, though: It is your year of less. Walk away from the ornaments!😅
How is your 2024 going? What are you most proud of? Do you still have goals that you want to achieve before this year is through? Let me know in the comments. I would love to hear from you.
It’s Christmas Eve! I am very excited as I get to see my dad tomorrow. My heart is sore that my son will not be with us, but I know he misses us already. I am looking forward to being around the rest of my family!
I used to love the rituals and traditions of Christmas as a kid. My mother would bake Christmas mince pies the night before to have with coffee/tea after midnight mass. I was not much of a fan, but I enjoyed them when they came out of the oven. Her pastry was always light and crispy, so I loved biting into the pies. We would attend midnight mass, which was the most popular mass. I don’t think our church was ever as full during the year as it was for midnight mass. It was the coolest place to be!
Image: Canva
When we got home, we got to open our gifts. Sometimes, that gift was a birthday and Christmas present since my birthday was two weeks after, or it was a small gift at Christmas, and I would receive the main one for my birthday. At the time, my heart would be a bit sore, but one nice gift was definitely better than none. I grew up in a middle-class family, so there was always enough to meet our needs and, pretty often, our wants as well, but sometimes the needs required a little more of a stretch in the budget. In South Africa, January is also the start of the school year, so school uniforms, etc., are the budget priority every year. I digress… once all the gifts were opened, it was time for bed. In the morning, my mum would cook a hearty lunch. There was always tongue, roast beef or pork, a curry, rice, salad, or veggies. My favourite part was always dessert. My mum made a traditional boiled Christmas pudding and would stuff a few coins inside. Everyone always got one, but it was that moment of sheer delight when you heard your teaspoon scrape against it as you took another spoonful or you saw it peaking through in your pudding. Even though it was guaranteed, I always felt super lucky to get one.
After lunch, my dad would insist that he suffered from a skin shortage and that his expanded tummy was pulling his eyelids close. 😂 My sisters and I would be occupied with our gifts, or we would compare gifts with neighbourhood friends. My mum would rest.
Christmas at Granny’s
We continued this tradition until the year before my mum passed away. Our kids loved it just as much as we did. We would leave a biscuit and milk for Father Christmas, and the person who locked up when leaving for midnight mass would have to place the gifts under the tree, drink the milk, and eat the biscuits. 😂 Every year, without fail, the kids were in awe. They believed Father Christmas had visited while we were in church and left their gifts. When my son was about five, he was convinced he heard Father Christmas’s sleigh flying over the church. He was too cute.
Our new ritual is to assemble at my baby sister’s house for lunch, and we open our gifts there. Her husband and mother-in-law make us divine curries, biryanis, gammon, and salads. Yum! My mouth waters at the thought. I make the traditional Christmas pudding, and I still add the coins for the fun of it. I am so grateful to have such fantastic memories of Christmas and to have been able to share my childhood experiences with my son. We have a new reality now, and I feel it is fitting that the tradition has changed, as it would not have been the same without my mum. She was central to the old one. I am also grateful that I still get to celebrate Christmas and that I get to do it with my family.
I have been searching for pics of Christmases past and I noticed that I have very few. While I am disappointed, I also see it as a good thing. It means I am so present in the moment that I tend to forget about my phone. That is a very rare for me these days. Christmas is definitely an “All In” day for me.
Do you still follow the same rituals as you did as a child, or have you created new rituals and traditions for your family? Let me know in the comments.
Thanks for stopping by. Have a wonderful Christmas! Be blessed.
Grounded African 