Today Facebook reminded me of a 10 year old post. I was celebrating having enrolled for my BA in psychology and anthropology. Everyone thought I was mad. Today I am counting down the weeks to graduation day for my BA Honours in psychology.
It was a reminder that the time will fly by anyway. Time’s passing is out of my control but what is in my control is how I use it. Sometimes our dreams and goals seem so far away and we give up because we think it will take too long to achieve. The reality is that the time is going to pass anyway so go out and do that you have always wanted to do. One day you will look back and realise who much you maximised your time on this earth instead of wasting it in fear of “how long a dream or goal will take to achieve”.
Haven you ever chosen to do something even though it would take you what seemed like forever?
Last week, I had an experience where the outcome of a presentation was not received in the way I had expected it to be. I was pretty devastated, even though I am conscious of the fact that I never have total control of the outcome. In hindsight, there were a number of reasons for this. One of the key reasons is that I allowed my superiors to dictate the methodology to me even though they are not experts in my field. The minute I did this, I weakened my authority as an expert in my field.
The realisation was a wake-up call. I began to reflect on all the other situations where I was uncomfortable with the outcome. I realised that I had done it in those situations as well.
Next, I asked myself how I can take back my authority because I have allowed this to go on for too long. I have arrived at two courses of action for myself:
Seniority does not equal authority in all aspects. I must ask more and better questions to understand the stakeholder’s needs and expected outcomes to confidently design the correct study to deliver the result and not let them dictate how to do it. They honestly don’t know.
I need to work on my self-belief to truly take ownership of my area of expertise.
I must remind myself that failure is not the end of the world. There is a lesson in it. Learn from it and move on. Do not fear it.
Reflecting on what happened has really helped me get to grips with how to prevent this type of thing in the future.
Have you found yourself in a similar predicament? What did you do to overcome it?
Hello again. I have had the privilege of attending three different tertiary institutions thus far. I say thus far because I have two more qualifications that I will complete in the next decade. Let’s get started.
Natal Technikon (now Durban University of Technology)
I was in my final year of high school, the year Nelson Mandela was released. As a result, I was able to apply to what was traditionally white-only tertiary institutions to study. I had no idea what I wanted to study. I just knew that I wanted to study something that was not offered by the University in my home town and it had to include science. My cousin was a food technologist. It sounded interesting and it met the other criteria i set, so that’s what I decided to apply for.
The campus was in Durban, less than an hour from my hometown, so I didn’t stray too far from home. I had a blast! It was the first time I interacted with different races every day. It was great to get to know them and to dispel the “myths” I had heard about the different races growing up. Everyone was just an average human being like me. They had their issues, and their cultural differences became clear, but that was it really. I think we were all pretty fascinated with each other. It was also clear that there were considerable differences between the educational systems. Each race has its own syllabus for each subject. I was very unprepared for tertiary education, but I was fortunate to partner with a fantastic woman named Jessica on our projects, and thanks to her, I managed to pass.
I eventually walked away with a National Diploma in Food Technology. It took me a lot longer because my priorities were in the wrong place, but I got to graduate. This was one period of my life that I am very grateful for. It’s the only time one gets to be carefree like a child while enjoying the privilege of being considered an adult. It’s this in-between stage of life that feels like a right of passage. I wish it were possible for every person to experience it.
Damelin College
Fast forward a few years. Thanks to my diploma, I eventually ended up working as a factory microbiologist. I wanted to understand production management a little better, so I took a course at night at Damelin. It’s a private college. If I remember correctly, I was the only woman in the class and it was quite fascinating at how all the men bent over backwards to help me understand the concepts. That course took a few months but this time I passed everything with flying colours.
Image: Canva
University of South Africa
It turned out that my diplomas were not sufficient to put me in line for a management position at the company for which I worked. (I still work for the same company today.) I began studying towards a BCompt in order to become a chartered accountant but made a swap for a Bcom majoring in Marketing once it became apparent that accounting was no longer my thing. I excelled at accountancy in high school, but this was accounting on another level. By this time, I was working in R&D and working closely with the marketing team. I also worked closely with the Consumer Insights team, and I knew this was what I wanted to do one day. I thought the marketing degree would cover both, but it didn’t quite do it for me. Despite this, I got the degree anyway and the management position.
I was still fascinated with the psychological principles underlying the test methods we used in market research, so I enrolled for a BA in psychology and anthropology. I loved it, and before my mum passed, I told her that I would become a doctor after all. I told her I would be attaining a PhD in psychology because I enjoy it so much, and I hope to contribute to society’s body of knowledge through the research I hope to conduct in the future. I completed my BA Honours in Psychology – Counselling Psychology in December last year and plan on enrolling for my Masters next year. I am not sure which University I will enrol at, though. Time will tell (and finances). I am really looking forward to graduating this year, though! It’s to step back and just celebrate what I have accomplished thus far.
The University of South Africa is a distance learning institution, so I have completed the last three qualifications by studying at home every night. It has not always been easy as a single mom, but I must admit that because I enjoy learning so much, I have enjoyed the journey. I must say, though, that having some life and business experience under my belt has helped me grasp concepts faster. This is probably also why I have been able to enjoy the journey so much.
Phew…that was a long story, but that is the “condensed” version of my time at college …lol. Thanks for walking down memory lane with me.
Did you also find yourself pivoting and returning to university at some point? What were your highlights if you did attend university? If you didn’t when you completed school, are you keen to go now, or is it just not your thing? Let me know in the comments.
Grounded African 